Most men think you’re supposed to chase after women. But what if I told you that it’s better to have a woman chasing you? You’d probably ask me how to get a woman to chase you. The good news is that it isn’t magic. In fact, it’s a simple and effective system that any man can use.
Putting Yourself First
All men have to set priorities. This is especially true when it comes to your dating life. People don’t chase after things that are always available. They only chase after things that are relatively scarce. Here’s the best way to prioritize your life:
- Work and Career: This is the priority that makes all other priorities possible. You’ve got to pay the bills. Without taking care of your work and your career, you won’t be able to do anything else.
- Hobbies and Passions: Personal passions are important. How much time do you spend wishing you had more time for them? If you want to get a woman to chase you, actively making time for your hobbies and passions is an important part of creating personal boundaries.
- Socializing and Women: Once you have made time in your life for yourself, then it’s time to start making time for other people. Start with nurturing and growing the connections you already have. Then move on to making new ones.
Once you start becoming the man you’ve always wanted to be, you’re going to seem more socially valuable and “hard to get.” On that day, you’re going to see women kicking your door down.
Start Taking the Offensive
You’ve heard it 1,000 times before, but it’s true: Fewer things are sexier to women than confidence. When you start prioritizing your time and making more time for yourself, you’re going to start gaining confidence. Now it’s time to display that confidence. How do we do that?
By taking the initiative. When you see a woman out that you want to talk to, move with all deliberate speed. The more you do this, the easier it will come and the more confident you will be generally. As men, we’re supposed to take the initiative for a number of complex evolutionary and social reasons. Women pace us, set boundaries and let us know when we’re going too far.
Set a goal to talk to a certain number of women during the week, then follow through on that goal. Talk to women at bars, on the way to work, in coffee shops — wherever you see a woman who strikes your fancy, take the initiative. Show her that you’re a confident man who goes after what he wants, because you are.
Get Lots of Baskets for Your Eggs
Women will chase you when they know there’s a possibility you won’t always be there. Pursuing multiple women at one time lets her know that you aren’t placing all your bets on her. You’re playing the field, looking for the woman who is worth your time. When you head out for the night, bounce around, talking to different women. When you start dating, dating around, taking out different women. Not does this give you a clearer vision of what you want and don’t want, it also communicates that you’re not hitching all your hopes to one woman. When she knows you’re not just sitting around waiting for her, she’s going to be far more apt to chase after you.
Be The Guy Who Gets Her
When you’re talking to a woman or dating her, she already knows that you’re attracted to her appearance. She wants to know that you like her for who she is. More than that she wants to know that you “get” her. The best way to do that is to create a real connection. There’s a few ways to do this:
- Expressing Interest: Let her know that you like her for something other than her appearance. This can be as simple as telling her “I dig you” or “You seem cool.”
- Listen Actively: Listen to what she has to say. Nod your head and maintain good eye contact while she’s talking to you. Body language is very powerful. Using it to show her that you’re listening speaks volumes.
- Connect With Her Words: When it’s your turn to talk, tie what you say to what she just said. For example, if she’s talking about feeling overwhelmed at work you can say “Yeah, being stressed at work is no good.” If she’s talking about how much she likes volunteering at an animal shelter, say “It sounds like that’s really rewarding for you.” The point is to show her that you’re listening and that you understand.
When you’re able to make an emotional connection with her, you’re going to become the guy that understands her. That’s something pretty much all women are looking for.