The Best Way to Tell a Girl You Like Her

In most cases, the best way to tell a girl you like her is to simply man up and do it – accepting whatever outcome occurs. That being said, there are a few things you can do in leading up to telling a girl you like her that will help you get the positive response you want. So before you make your move, check out these tips on how to tell a girl you like her.

young couple in the parkBody language and attraction
One way to show a girl you’re that interested in her is to give off signals of attraction through your body language. Show a woman the right body language and she’ll begin to assume you’re interested in her without you having to say a word.

The key to showing a girl you like her in this way is to give her positive body language throughout your interactions. Make eye contact with the woman regularly, listen actively to what she says, and face her so both your chest and feet are pointing her direction during your interactions. This kind of attention will get her to start thinking that you just might be interested in her.

Just be careful not to overdo it as too much positive body language with women can make a guy look needy.

Showing a girl interest while creating sexual attraction
An even more effective way to subtly show a girl you’re interested in her is through touch. Not only will touching her show the girl you’re interested, but it will simultaneously escalate the sexual tension between the two of you.

So if you’re interested in a girl and want to get the girl to like you, it is critical that you touch her more. You may want to start with light, playful taps on the elbows during conversation – and build from there. For example you could: gently touch her arm/shoulder/back/knee throughout your conversation, guide the small of her back as she walks through a doorway, or mix side-hugs into the interaction.

The trick in using touch to attract women is to gradually increase the duration and intimacy of the touch (moving from elbow to shoulder to neck, etc. while making contact for progressively longer periods of time). As she becomes more and more comfortable being physical with you at deeper and deeper levels, the sexual attraction the woman feels towards you will gradually strengthen.

(For more on how to escalate with women and get women turned on through touch, check out the Pickup Podcast toolbox episode on touch)

How to tell a girl you like her: Weave it into the conversation
Dropping the “I like you” bomb out of nowhere can sometimes be a lot for a girl to handle. If her mind is focused on other things and she’s not expecting it, then it may throw her through a bit of a loop. So before telling a girl you like her, you may want to first steer the conversation in that direction.

For example, when talking to the girl you like you may want to bring up the subject of dating. Ask her about her dating life – see what she’s looking for in a man/relationship and if there’s anyone she’s currently interested in. After she explains this, it’s your turn to talk about your dating life. Now that she’s focused on you and hearing what you have to say, she’s less likely to be taken off-guard when you tell her you like her.

What to say when asking a girl out
One of the best ways to let a girl know you like her is to simply ask her out on a date. Of course when it comes to how to ask a girl out, some ways are better than others.

For example, saying “hey let’s meet up Friday” can leave her unsure of what you’re intention is and what you want. She may just assume you want to meet up as friends. Further, you also don’t want to use a line like “will you go out with me?” as that can come across as weak and needy.

The best way to ask a girl out then, involves being clear in your intention while asking in a confident manner. Saying something like “I want to take you on a date, are you free Friday?” can work great. It shows a woman confidence as you own up to the fact that you’re interested in her. It also shows the clear intention that you want to date her.

How to ask girl out
Now, the words you use when asking a girl out are not going to be nearly as important as the way you deliver them. So here are three tips for asking a girl out that will help you do it effectively

  • Assume she’ll say yes. Focus on the reasons she would want to date a guy like you and on all the potential fun you’ll have together. This will help you to be confident when asking a girl out.
  • Be unattached to the outcome. If she says yes, that’s awesome. If she says no, no worries. Just a minor setback that won’t keep you down for long. At the end of the day, know that you will continue to live a kick-ass life regardless of her response.
  • Be vulnerable. Stop trying to “do it right” and just express exactly how you feel and what you want without holding back. As mentioned in the opening paragraph, this is often the best way to tell a girl you like her as she’ll immediately appreciate your courage and honesty (which will only make the woman more attracted to you). Plus, you will feel amazing for fearlessly opening up like that.

Brian M - author of 191 posts on The Art of Charm

Once he realized attraction was something he could learn, Brian spent way too much of his free time studying and practicing everything he could find on the subject. He stumbled across The Art of Charm podcast and eventually signed up for an AoC bootcamp. Excited by the progress he's made in his own life since the program, he decided to start writing for AoC to help other guys do the same. By writing about interpersonal dynamics, he’s finally able to put that psychology degree to good use.

Email


in Art of Dating, Dating Tips