How can you tell if a girl likes you? It can be tough. One reason for this is that girls don’t want to be rude. They’ll talk to a guy for a while just to be polite. This fact alone can cause confusion for guys, and leads to two major problems:
Some guys don’t realize this fact at all. A guy will think that merely having a pleasant interaction automatically means the girl likes him.
On the flip side, a guy may assume a girl is just talking to him to be polite when in fact she actually likes him.
Obviously you don’t want to find yourself in either situation as they’re both frustrating as hell. But by knowing how to tell if a girl likes you, you’ll be able to avoid both scenarios.
Below are two things you can look for during a conversation to help decipher the girls who are just being polite from the girls that are actually interested in you. (For more on how to tell if a girl likes you, check out this very insightful episode Pickup Podcast episode with AJ, Johnny and Justin).
She’s actively engaged
When a girl is just being polite or flat out not interested, she’ll try to get through the interaction with the bare minimum effort. Her goals will be to end it as quick as possible without being rude. She’ll acknowledge and address and questions or comments you make, but will not look to build on anything you say.
However if a girl likes you she’s going to be engaged in in the interaction. If you start to banter, she’ll banter back. If you ask a question, she’ll use more than a word or two to answer – and then will flip the question around to you. If the conversation starts to stall, she’ll find a way to keep it going (ask a new question, etc).
She starts to share
Most people are not willing to share personal information with just anybody. Any time you share personal information you risk being judged, teased, or rejected. Even when these fears aren’t an issue, there can still be a feeling of “why bother? What would be the point in sharing information about myself with some stranger?”
If a girl starts to share personal information it’s a sign that she trusts and feels comfortable with you. It’s also a sign she’s interested in you as sharing this information gives you a chance to know her better. She’s giving you the opening you need to form a deeper connection.
{Side note: By “personal information” I don’t just mean information about her job and the town she lives in. Life facts like this generally don’t mean much. But if what she’s sharing carries any emotional weight (she talks about how she feels about the job or city she’s in), or is unique and personal (stories about her childhood, etc.) that’s real sharing. That’s where she’s really showing you who she is and is looking to form a connection.}
Since sharing personal information can be scary, it’s important that you do it first. Share a bit about what it was like for you growing up before you ask her to do the same. Doing this lets her know that it’s safe to open up. Also, since you’ve already opened up she’ll feel it’s “her turn” and will be more compelled to start sharing with you.
While a girl who is engaged and sharing about herself may like you, she may not necessarily like you in the way you hope. If you’re not careful you could very easily become just a great guy friend who she has no romantic interest in.
But you can prevent that from happening. You can make sure that the women you meet not only like you, but actively want you. It’s a simple matter of knowing how to lead the interaction. AoC offers live week-long boot-camps in LA. To see if the program is right for you, click here to learn more.
