Want to know how to attract any girl? It starts by getting the girl interested in you and curious about you. With that foundation you can gradually build a lasting attraction with any woman. As for how to spark that interest and curiosity; here are some tips that will help you do just that.
Confidence is the one irresistible trait you must have if you want to attract women. And women can tell right away whether or not you’re confident just by looking at your body language. For example, if you’re fidgeting or making yourself “small” in your environment, women will see you as lacking confidence.
So the first step in how to attract any girl is to adopt confident body language. Keep your body movements calm and controlled. Make yourself big. Don’t be afraid to take up room and claim the space immediately around you. If that’s difficult due to feeling nervous or uncomfortable, take slow, deep breaths while focusing on the sensations in your body (can you feel your feet?). This will help you relax and allow that confident body language to come out naturally.
Get her laughing
Every girl wants a guy who can make her laugh. And there’s no better time to prove you have that ability than at the beginning of the conversation. Get a girl to smile early on and it’ll help her relax and feel comfortable talking to you. All while sparking that interest and attraction.
One technique you can use to start a conversation and get a girl laughing is playful teasing. This is particularly effective because most guys are too insecure to playfully tease a girl right off the bat. By starting your conversations this way you show you’re not intimidated by attractive women. You can get her laughing and show tremendous confidence at the same time.
Here are just two examples of how to start a conversation with playful teasing: (1) “You know you’d look cute in a purple Mohawk” (2) “Excuse me, I’m trying to have a guy’s night out and you totally ruined it. You’re too damn cute”. Lines like these can get a conversation started on a fun, playful note.
Make her win you over
Projecting confidence and making a girl laugh are common tips for how to attract any girl. But there’s another tip that’s equally important that doesn’t get nearly as much discussion. It’s called qualification.
Qualification is all about getting the woman to prove that she’s a cool, interesting girl. It shows you’re a guy with standards who doesn’t invest his time and attention in just any attractive girl. When you actively filter women like this they see you as a high-value guy. They will then put more effort into keeping your interest and attention.
After bantering with a girl you can start qualifying by asking questions like “So what’s your deal?” or “What are three things I wouldn’t know about you by looking?” These questions are great because they’re open-ended and allow the girl to share as much information as she feels comfortable. They also give you a great chance to get to know her. You can then find out if she truly is a cool, interesting girl.
Create an emotional connection
In order to know how to attract any girl it’s important to know how to connect with any girl. That is, how to build an emotional connection so she feels close to you, and you feel close to her.
One way to build that emotional connection with a girl is to use the “I” perspective when speaking. Express your thoughts, opinions – and most importantly your emotions – directly. For example, saying “I love Game of Thrones” gives her a glimpse into your emotional world. But if you said “Game of Thrones is a great show” then that emotional component is taken out of the picture completely. Talking about your personal experiences, rather than objective facts, is going to get her feeling more deeply connected to you.
Build sexual tension
No article on how to attract any girl would be complete without a tip on how to build sexual tension. After all this is what keeps guys out of the friend-zone.
One of the most effective ways to build sexual tension with women is through touch. Start touching the girl early on in your conversation by lightly tapping the back of your hand against her elbow. If she’s okay with that contact, you can gradually move on to touch her for longer periods of time in more intimate areas (shoulder, back, thigh, face).
The key to knowing when you should touch more – or less – is to check for compliance. If she allows you to touch her, or starts touching you in response, then you can take things a step further with your touch. If however she recoils or moves away when you touch her, then give her space. Build more comfort through banter and creating an emotional connection. When she’s a bit more comfortable, try to build that sexual tension once again.
Be unattached to the outcome
One thing that is will help you tremendously when learning how to attract any woman is being unattached to the outcome. That is, don’t get hung up on whether or not you get a phone number, a date, or even get the girl to like you. Just enjoy the process of meeting women and focus on having fun. If you’re not looking to get anything from your interactions with women then you’ll have no trouble being confident, fun, open, and sexual with women.
The best way to make this your natural way of being is to get lots of experience talking and flirting with women. Make a point to talk to at least three women a day and practice the techniques mentioned in this article and elsewhere on the site. The more experience you get the less you’ll care about each individual interaction.
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Once he realized attraction was something he could learn, Brian spent way too much of his free time studying and practicing everything he could find on the subject. He stumbled across The Art of Charm podcast and eventually signed up for an AoC bootcamp. Excited by the progress he's made in his own life since the program, he decided to start writing for AoC to help other guys do the same. By writing about interpersonal dynamics, he’s finally able to put that psychology degree to good use.
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