Gabrielle Reece | Less Than Perfect (Episode 619)

[00:01] [Music]

[00:06] yeah so thanks for taking the time to

[00:08] come on the show today as well I know

[00:09] you're super busy moving back and forth

[00:11] as well I know it's an honor thank you

[00:13] when when you're splitting time between

[00:15] those two things do you have to fly from

[00:17] Hawaii a bunch on business or do you try

[00:18] to set it up so that you're in the US

[00:20] when you have to do all the u.s. stuff

[00:22] and then when you're in Hawaii you can

[00:23] actually have a life you know you you

[00:25] would think that after 22 years of doing

[00:29] it that I would but the reality is

[00:30] because you know you know this as being

[00:32] a self-employed freelance person that

[00:35] things arise so what we do is you just

[00:38] base out of each place and then travel

[00:40] accordingly I mean there have been times

[00:42] where and again you know it's all how

[00:44] you look at it so I always go well this

[00:46] is an opportunity but I've gone to New

[00:48] York from Hawaii sort of three times in

[00:50] five weeks because they were spontaneous

[00:52] great jobs that you go yeah so it's the

[00:56] nature of the beef and and I always kind

[00:59] of looked at it like will you set it up

[01:01] this way and this is part of why you're

[01:03] not doing a nine-to-five job and so this

[01:05] is the other side of that just and it's

[01:07] a great thing yeah I suppose it comes

[01:10] with the territory it's a bummer to fly

[01:12] from Hawaii to New York which was that

[01:14] like in 14 hours or something it just

[01:16] seems so far yeah well going when you

[01:19] have the tailwind from Hawaii to New

[01:21] York it's it's probably only about 10:00

[01:23] 10:00 or 11:00 and then coming back it's

[01:25] a little bit longer but again I just

[01:27] sort of look at the opposite which is

[01:29] for me personally I like being

[01:32] self-employed and being an independent

[01:34] contractor and you just have to be

[01:37] willing to do what it takes to do that

[01:39] yeah and it sure beats going to an

[01:41] office and sitting in air-conditioning

[01:43] and and all that stuff for the for every

[01:45] day that would probably that seems like

[01:47] the opposite of what you would be able

[01:48] to do I mean looking knowing what what I

[01:52] do about you and stuff like that knowing

[01:53] how active you guys are sitting all day

[01:55] and at a desk would literally kill you I

[01:57] think yeah I think it would be you know

[02:01] there's people who sort of say hey

[02:02] listen I love to have it I love the

[02:04] window of okay I work from this hour to

[02:06] this hour I leave it at the office I go

[02:08] home and then that's it

[02:09] I mean you know this from the job that

[02:10] you do the job is sort of all the time

[02:13] it's also part of who you are but I like

[02:16] the movement and the freedom and the a

[02:19] little bit of the unpredictability of

[02:21] what we do certainly more than that sort

[02:24] of locked and loaded Monday through

[02:27] Friday deal what is it about

[02:29] unpredictability that you actually like

[02:30] because I've heard that a lot from

[02:34] people and similar active kind of gigs

[02:38] pro athletes and things like that they

[02:40] love the routine of training in some way

[02:42] but yeah also this element of excitement

[02:44] that comes from oh we're going to do

[02:46] this idiom we're going to do that and

[02:47] they don't seem to outgrow it I mean

[02:49] you're you're a mom now you're married

[02:51] now you still like that yeah I think you

[02:54] know for me it's a good point of I need

[02:55] a certain amount of linear activity a

[02:57] consistency in my training and my food

[03:00] to kind of keep me tethered to something

[03:01] but then beyond that you sort of feel

[03:04] like it's maybe what you liked about

[03:06] competition and training is it's a

[03:08] little bit unknown and so to put

[03:11] yourself in an unknown situation on a

[03:13] regular basis feels good because you

[03:15] feel like you're sort of testing

[03:17] yourself you're having an opportunity to

[03:19] rise to an occasion maybe it's a little

[03:22] bit uncomfortable or scary so that that

[03:26] feels good because it I feel like that's

[03:29] how you continue to get to know who you

[03:31] are

[03:32] and so I like it and it's an adventure

[03:35] and quite frankly you don't want things

[03:37] to always be the same because then you

[03:38] never grow you're not learning new stuff

[03:40] you're not challenging yourself in a new

[03:42] way and I think that that sort of is an

[03:44] essence of life it's something I read in

[03:48] your book was life is lived outside your

[03:49] comfort zone and that's a very popular I

[03:52] hate the word meme because it sounds

[03:53] degrading but I guess it is kind of a

[03:55] mirror or model and especially in your

[03:58] physician just constant improvement

[04:00] constantly trying to make yourself

[04:02] uncomfortable and grow and I think

[04:06] that's admirable I think that's what

[04:07] separates a lot of people who are

[04:09] successful in areas like you are versus

[04:11] people who just kind of are dreamers or

[04:13] wannabes and I also read that you only

[04:16] feel like working out or training 50% at

[04:18] a time which is really I was surprised

[04:20] by that being a pro athlete

[04:23] you know model are you still are will

[04:26] only feel like training half the time

[04:28] that sounds like me well listen I think

[04:31] - let's be honest I think that's most

[04:33] people every once in a while I've met

[04:35] athletes or people not let's be clear

[04:38] about something first of all I believe

[04:39] in all of us most of us were athletes

[04:42] right there's some who kind of express

[04:44] it more and others but every once in

[04:46] while you meet a person and they can be

[04:47] an attorney but they're an athlete and

[04:49] they are you know they wake up and

[04:53] they've driven and it's a you know they

[04:54] serve that's what they are doing but I

[04:56] believe that most of us probably feel

[04:59] like training if you're lucky 50% of the

[05:02] time so I always don't want to sell a

[05:05] bill of goods to people like I'm just so

[05:08] inspired every day and you know to go

[05:11] and and do it and be tormented I'd

[05:13] rather be sitting down or I'd rather lay

[05:16] in bed for an extra you know thirty

[05:17] minutes or whatever that is and because

[05:19] I think that's the important part of the

[05:21] message is it's just about creating that

[05:24] system and that infrastructure for

[05:26] success it's not about feeling like you

[05:28] want to all the time that's important to

[05:31] realize I think where a lot of people

[05:32] who are not even just with working out

[05:34] are athletics I think a lot of people

[05:36] think well this isn't the job or career

[05:39] for me because I'm not a hundred percent

[05:42] of the time I'm not waking up motivated

[05:44] to attack the day or oh this isn't the

[05:47] sport for me this workouts not going to

[05:48] work for me because I often don't feel

[05:50] like going and when we read articles in

[05:54] Maxim or Self magazine or inside of a

[05:57] glossy you found the articles that have

[06:00] a lot of times people that that have

[06:02] career similar to yours it's always like

[06:04] they're sitting on the beach and the Sun

[06:06] and the sunrise and it's just like every

[06:08] day is an inspiration and you just think

[06:11] oh crap I can never be like Gabby Reece

[06:13] because I don't feel like that at all I

[06:15] wake up with oatmeal's

[06:16] stuck to my chin you know this is not

[06:19] how a my life is I'll share something

[06:22] with you like my I had a knee

[06:23] replacement last year and my knee has

[06:25] probably been hurting me for upwards to

[06:27] 14 or 15 years prior to the surgery

[06:30] right and even now to this day it's not

[06:32] functioning really the way I would like

[06:34] it to I mean it's great it was a great

[06:36] surgery and it's

[06:37] and there is frustration and insecurity

[06:40] and all kinds of emotions around this

[06:43] and I deal with it every day but then so

[06:47] I guess what I'm saying is we all have

[06:49] these kind of self whether they're

[06:51] self-inflicted obstacles or ones brought

[06:54] on by life that we are contending with

[06:57] and it's kind of like how you look at it

[07:00] so I can go I could dive deep down that

[07:02] hole and be poor me and my knees not

[07:03] bending and it's not straightening the

[07:05] way I wanted to and if steps are too

[07:07] high I'm weird and feel awkward and all

[07:10] these things or I can say but I'm not I

[07:13] don't have a major illness the rest of

[07:15] my body is working very well and so I'm

[07:17] going to work around it and I'm going to

[07:19] acknowledge that some days I feel crappy

[07:21] and I feel vulnerable and not my best

[07:26] self but I'm going to work around it and

[07:30] I and I really believe that that is life

[07:33] you know if you know like I guess maybe

[07:35] feels like it was a Buddhist that the

[07:37] pain and the good and the bad it's all

[07:39] part of the same story yeah I think it's

[07:42] important to realize that because a lot

[07:44] of times we're bombarded with this

[07:45] inspirational material that says you

[07:48] should feel good all the time you should

[07:49] feel motivated all the time you should

[07:51] feel even though you have this setback

[07:53] now it's your strength and it's like no

[07:56] it's not a strength it's a broken mean

[07:58] and it sucks but it's I'm still able to

[08:00] persevere and push through that yeah and

[08:02] I think everybody has that because you

[08:05] know sometimes people say to me wow you

[08:07] know I can't believe all that you you

[08:08] know you juggle when you get done and I

[08:11] say okay let's be really clear about

[08:12] something first of all I'm wildly and

[08:15] sanitized right like I if I work I

[08:18] probably get paid very well for what I

[08:20] do there's there's rewards there's

[08:23] attention there's all these things right

[08:25] I say you want to talk to you about

[08:26] somebody who's gelling a lot how about

[08:28] somebody who looks like a single parent

[08:30] for example who's working three jobs

[08:32] just to keep the lights on like that's

[08:35] the real stuff and for me I think it's

[08:37] about keeping perspective on what we're

[08:40] reacting to so oh you know well you know

[08:43] Larry calls it the wambulance it's like

[08:45] oh my you know my niece or it's like

[08:48] yeah big effing deal like you you know

[08:50] what I mean like it

[08:51] keeping everything in its perspective

[08:53] and in its place because then

[08:54] emotionally you're sort of a you're

[08:57] reacting to it kind of accordingly

[08:58] because when I see what other people go

[09:00] through I'm like man I have got nothing

[09:02] I'm not dude like I'm not doing anything

[09:04] I haven't done anything so I think it's

[09:08] for me I'm I kind of look at it that way

[09:10] and I've said this many times you know

[09:12] it we have low cards and high cards it's

[09:13] like which cards do you want to play in

[09:15] your hand do you want to cry that you

[09:16] have low cards you want to play your

[09:18] high cards and get on with it

[09:20] buy low cards and high cards you just

[09:21] mean that everyone gets dealt the hands

[09:23] and it just depends on which choices

[09:26] you're going to make that day especially

[09:27] when it comes to the mood that you're in

[09:29] or how you react to events well that's

[09:31] it and you know it's like when I was

[09:32] younger I had my mom left for a few

[09:35] years my dad died I had some pretty

[09:37] wonky stuff happening but yet I was 6

[09:39] foot 3 and 15 and had a certain look

[09:42] that those were some high cards that if

[09:45] I navigated those correctly they helped

[09:48] me overcome the low cards and and I

[09:51] think people a lot of times are always

[09:53] retelling an old story I have to be

[09:56] mindful of that too and going well this

[09:58] happened to me and that happened to me

[09:59] it's like it did but is there not

[10:02] something else in your story that that

[10:04] could feasibly help you move on from

[10:07] that and even appreciate some of that

[10:09] stuff and read and listen I'm not

[10:11] suggesting there aren't things that

[10:12] people go through that it's it's almost

[10:14] virtually impossible to get over I'm not

[10:15] saying that but I'm saying most of us

[10:18] walking around it's like low cards and

[10:20] high cards you know like there's all

[10:23] these beauty jingles you know accentuate

[10:26] the positive eliminate the negative you

[10:28] know it's all this stuff it's kind of

[10:30] that silliness but it's very true yeah I

[10:33] think it's it's I'm not a huge fan of

[10:36] Instagram memes that make people feel

[10:38] inferior or you know attempts of being

[10:40] inspiring but it there is some truth to

[10:42] the fact that you can make choices with

[10:45] whatever you've got and that a lot of

[10:47] times those same situations do make you

[10:49] stronger in one way even if they are

[10:51] objectively not positive things well

[10:54] again I use my name

[10:56] I have tried more exercises and

[10:58] therapies and tumeric drinks than you

[11:00] can imagine and it's why because I have

[11:02] an obstacle if everything was cool I

[11:04] just go on

[11:05] as usual and because of this this is a

[11:08] teacher that's making me stretch and

[11:10] learn more and understand about other

[11:11] things that I probably wouldn't have

[11:13] because I'm inherently would be lazy and

[11:16] it wasn't necessary so I I agree with

[11:19] you and and I think my hope is like I'm

[11:22] always want to talk about it in a very

[11:24] blue-collar matter-of-fact way like I

[11:26] don't want to have my head in the clouds

[11:27] I want to be positive but still and sort

[11:31] of in that like you know very everyday

[11:34] way because when people talk to me like

[11:36] that that I can I can connect with that

[11:39] when they go on you know the spirit

[11:42] above and the sun is shining I just go

[11:44] yeah I don't I don't know about that so

[11:47] it's like trying to find that real

[11:50] matter-of-fact communication but yes

[11:53] being positive

[11:54] yeah where did you learn a lot of the

[11:56] matter of fact I mean you grew up where

[11:58] did you grow up you grew up turn to dad

[12:01] no my father's from Trinidad that's very

[12:04] good but close I mean I grew up in the

[12:06] West Indies but I did live in Long

[12:09] Island New York for five years a mom

[12:11] when I lived with friends of my mother I

[12:14] was raised by my aunt nur and Uncle Joe

[12:16] and and let me tell you my Uncle Joe was

[12:18] like a construction worker work for the

[12:20] Sanitation Department in New York and

[12:22] and and you know my aunt used to say

[12:25] like kid you know go away don't go away

[12:28] angry but just go away like they're very

[12:30] direct New York people and then in the

[12:34] in the Caribbean when you grow up on an

[12:36] island it's um it is different than the

[12:38] mainland us it's um I don't know it's

[12:42] kind of like I see it when I live in

[12:44] Hawaii there is a sort of a directness

[12:47] and a shorthand and and and I'm glad but

[12:53] I think I learned it definitely from

[12:55] from those two places and and it was

[12:57] also something that maybe because that's

[13:00] the way I could hear things maybe that

[13:02] that's the way I tried to communicate

[13:03] more sure shares and sports and sports

[13:06] listen let's call it for what it is

[13:08] starting at 15 I got really involved

[13:10] with sports coaches don't fluff it up

[13:12] and go on and on they go get it done get

[13:15] to the line get your arm up get it

[13:17] together you know

[13:18] you can do it let's go so I think that

[13:20] also that shorthand got developed did

[13:23] you I read that you didn't begin sports

[13:25] until eleventh grade and you said age

[13:27] fifteen so that kind of checks out how

[13:28] come you didn't get into sports sooner I

[13:30] mean I weren't used six-foot-something

[13:32] when you were like 12 yeah I was six

[13:35] feet at 12 and 63 at 15 but I again

[13:37] because I grew up in the Caribbean I did

[13:39] weld a little bit in volleyball my 10th

[13:42] grade year but organized sports back

[13:46] then you know on st. Thomas it wasn't

[13:49] like oh you know you could do something

[13:51] with this I think I was already dealing

[13:53] with some of my frustrations as already

[13:56] that tumultuous time in my life but also

[13:58] some of my history kind of aggravated so

[14:02] I started a little bit and then when I

[14:04] moved to Florida my junior year of high

[14:06] school which things were more organized

[14:08] athletics was sort of a real part of the

[14:11] culture of the school and things like

[14:13] that and I walked in at 15 at 6 3 they

[14:16] were like oh you're playing volleyball

[14:17] basketball so that's kind of how it

[14:19] happened you said you were aggravated

[14:21] when you were a kid what was going on in

[14:23] the island at that point you know I just

[14:27] had I didn't have a lot of stability and

[14:29] I think I was truly hurt from my

[14:35] situation with my mother

[14:37] I was I was hurt my feelings were

[14:39] probably hurt and I probably hadn't

[14:41] gotten over it yet you know she she did

[14:44] the best she could and it at you know 2

[14:45] and 1/2 years old she needed to take a

[14:47] she worked and left me with these people

[14:50] who raised me as their own child till I

[14:53] was 7 and then the problem was that then

[14:56] she decided she was ready so then I got

[14:58] the abstraction from that stable

[15:00] environment and that was very difficult

[15:02] and I think I carry that with me for for

[15:05] a while but it was the best thing that

[15:07] ever happened because first of all I

[15:11] understood like fast forward in a weird

[15:14] way my husband I have a stepdaughter she

[15:16] was a very small baby when I met my

[15:17] husband and I never thought for one

[15:19] second like hey I can be her mom because

[15:22] she has a great mom but I knew I could

[15:24] be impactful because I had experienced

[15:26] it with my aunt like if I just loved her

[15:29] that can be powerful

[15:32] so I got that gift I got being very

[15:35] resourceful independent organized

[15:38] because a lot of the people around me

[15:40] were not so there was a lot of great

[15:42] stuff that came out of it but at that

[15:43] time I was and then I was pissed because

[15:46] we moved from my home in the Caribbean

[15:48] to Florida which was really a very

[15:52] significant and important move that

[15:54] really changed the trajectory of my

[15:56] whole life

[15:57] but at the 15 years of age you know I'm

[16:00] leaving my boyfriend and my friends

[16:01] right right yeah and that's what's that

[16:03] was a primary concern at that point for

[16:05] sure yeah were there any special social

[16:08] skills that are required growing up on

[16:10] an island and then how did those change

[16:12] when you got to the mainland US and

[16:14] you're like not only do I have to move

[16:16] and make new friends I've got to figure

[16:18] out how people do things here again yeah

[16:21] well I'll take it a notch up from there

[16:23] so it came from a really loosey-goosey

[16:25] West Indian culture you know I always

[16:28] say that if a lot of the parents if they

[16:31] weren't from there why were they there

[16:33] it's like all of our parents were and

[16:35] some level kind of lunatics they were

[16:36] all you know it was Carnaval your

[16:38] parents are going to disappear for two

[16:39] three days so you know how you had that

[16:41] element to I'm when I moved to Florida

[16:44] my mother put me in a very very

[16:46] conservative Christian school so not

[16:49] only was I switching cultures then I was

[16:51] switching an entire kind of way of

[16:55] living and what is what was you know I

[16:58] was never taught about what how

[17:01] important it was what people thought you

[17:03] know when you that wasn't the thinking

[17:05] where I grew up and then when you go to

[17:07] a very conservative Christian

[17:08] environment the length of your skirt

[17:10] also as part of the conversation right

[17:12] so I mean it was radically different and

[17:15] again really it was important I needed

[17:19] sort of another part of the scale I

[17:22] needed to balance it out a little bit

[17:24] more and I got that but the adjustment

[17:26] was brutal I mean yeah well the

[17:29] principal let me in the school and I had

[17:31] no formal religious kind of you know

[17:35] training or part of my life was it just

[17:37] wasn't a part of how I grew up and then

[17:40] he actually ended up being a really

[17:43] important person

[17:44] mr. greener but he let me in the school

[17:47] but the joke was I was the only quote

[17:48] unsaved person in the high school Wow

[17:51] try that

[17:52] yeah and I'm 6 and I'm 6 3 I have blonde

[17:56] hair

[17:56] I probably swear like a sailor at a

[17:58] Christian school so it was it was really

[18:02] funny but then there I met very good

[18:03] people and I understood that people

[18:06] could live a sort of a you know there's

[18:09] all elements of religion for me but then

[18:11] you go and certain people that have

[18:13] faith and it makes them more loving and

[18:17] less judgmental and they they have great

[18:20] families and all the sort of the great

[18:22] parts of that and I got to witness that

[18:24] and understand that oh that you know

[18:27] that's out there too so it was great and

[18:31] I had incredible coaches that took time

[18:33] and invested in me as a person and again

[18:38] it really changed I went from there to

[18:40] getting scholarships and going to

[18:41] college and playing ball and going on

[18:43] from there and I think clearly if I

[18:45] hadn't gone there and had those people

[18:47] impact me I I wouldn't I would have

[18:49] never pulled it you think you would have

[18:51] gone down hills just staying in that

[18:53] other environment yeah I probably would

[18:55] have had a kid by 19 you know if you

[18:58] know work in a gift shop because you

[19:00] don't understand what a big world it is

[19:02] sometimes when you live on an island and

[19:04] what is possible and how do you express

[19:06] yourself in those other ways you don't

[19:08] you're not really taught that and I

[19:10] think it's important to have some of

[19:13] that but then conversely I think it's

[19:14] dangerous to have kids be too stacked up

[19:17] and to schedules and to

[19:18] performance-oriented when they're young

[19:20] so it's like just finding that middle

[19:22] ground saying it's like with my kids I'm

[19:24] like listen be grounded that's why I

[19:27] love living in Hawaii and come from that

[19:29] grounded place and that place of respect

[19:31] you know auntie and uncle culture but

[19:33] you know what you can be anything you

[19:35] want it's a big world so I think it for

[19:37] me that that I would have definitely

[19:39] probably stayed in st. Thomas and and

[19:42] just kind of lived that life how do you

[19:45] pass these skills down to your kids

[19:47] besides just living in Hawaii I mean are

[19:48] you passing down athletic skills as well

[19:50] work ethic because you work really hard

[19:52] yeah I mean my husband and I both are by

[19:55] nature I think we you know we're sort of

[19:56] grinders

[19:58] but I it's an interesting thing man when

[20:00] it's your own kids they I always say

[20:02] they don't they don't really listen to

[20:05] you they really watch you and you can't

[20:07] really tell them you can try to instill

[20:09] the values and and tell them to what's

[20:13] important to you so honesty and hard

[20:16] work and and respecting others and

[20:18] respecting yourself but then the

[20:20] communication is now we want to

[20:22] encourage you to figure out what does

[20:24] turn you on and what excites you and

[20:26] what do you think you want to do but you

[20:28] still have to hit those fundamentals but

[20:30] I have no manual ultimately my kids

[20:33] probably listen to me you know 7% of the

[20:36] time I'm not sure and and then you know

[20:39] you surround them with other people that

[20:41] can have these influences because we're

[20:43] limited right where we we only know so

[20:46] much but then maybe you've got these

[20:48] other people that they give them a

[20:49] little bit of this and a little bit of

[20:50] that and you hope that the impact you

[20:54] know helps them navigate their own life

[20:56] and I tell my girls all the time listen

[20:57] I'm not here to control you I'm trying

[20:59] to teach you to control yourself you

[21:02] know and and get you to do things that

[21:05] are good and right for you and for your

[21:07] whole life but there's it is the hardest

[21:11] thing in the world to do you mentioned

[21:14] in your book that becoming a mother's

[21:16] like flipping a switch and you become

[21:17] someone else and it finally parenting

[21:20] finally pushes you to grow up

[21:21] what is it happening to you I mean how

[21:23] have you grown up as a result of of

[21:25] having kids

[21:26] well it's a deconstruction first of all

[21:29] I was much smarter and knew a lot more

[21:31] about what was going on at 21 now at 47

[21:34] I'm like holy I don't know anything and

[21:36] it brings you to your knees in a way

[21:38] that nothing else does and you surrender

[21:41] and at times like for example you want

[21:44] to react how you feel you really it's

[21:48] important to react to what is right and

[21:51] those things can be sometimes conflicted

[21:54] so sometimes maybe wyman impulse and I

[21:56] just want to tell everyone to eff off

[21:57] and throw [ __ ] like freak out and or

[22:01] whatever it is but in that moment you've

[22:04] got to really be disciplined and go what

[22:06] is the right thing to do right here and

[22:09] right now and sometimes

[22:10] you can be honest with yourself and say

[22:12] I have no clue so I'm going to do the

[22:14] best I can but it really it deconstructs

[22:18] you in a way that you know nothing else

[22:21] I've ever done has not even sports and

[22:24] it makes you also have to really

[22:27] confront the fact that you're going to

[22:30] get it wrong a lot of the time and that

[22:31] is a hard pill to swallow because you

[22:34] it's so important and you're so

[22:36] passionate about doing it right and

[22:37] there's just no chance

[22:39] it just isn't do you still take your

[22:41] younger kids on the road with you for

[22:43] work I know you used to do that yeah I

[22:45] do if it's you know especially if it's a

[22:47] little bit longer like more than two or

[22:49] three days and it makes sense

[22:52] I'll take them but learn I kind of have

[22:54] a thing where if one of us has to go the

[22:56] other one's usually at home and if it's

[22:58] something where he and I are going

[22:59] together then we really try to make sure

[23:01] that they come with us because for me I

[23:04] that is my most important job and being

[23:07] away from them for a extended period of

[23:10] time doesn't feel natural and and I will

[23:12] say this we have the luxury to say okay

[23:14] we're going to take the girls but you

[23:16] know there's days where I'm like oh my

[23:17] god just sure loves them you know

[23:19] because they're because it's you know

[23:22] kids don't do what you want them to do

[23:24] so you know but that's the great thing

[23:27] it's because it's more honest it's like

[23:29] listen you're not in control really I'm

[23:31] here in my life I'm all scheduled up

[23:33] it's all written down it's all perfect

[23:35] I'm not really in control like to

[23:36] pretend I'm in control so the kids are

[23:38] they remind you every single day like

[23:40] zero control

[23:42] I laugh I said this one time I was

[23:44] paddling on the river I go I realize I

[23:46] have power like I can take note of

[23:48] things I can move them from one side to

[23:49] the next but I have no control and that

[23:52] is a really interesting thing but yeah

[23:55] we bring them because it's my family and

[23:57] you know they're going to move out or 21

[23:59] year old is in college and you know they

[24:01] get on with their life so this is the

[24:03] time yeah you can't just you can't pause

[24:06] their life while you're busy doing your

[24:07] thing that's right this is my time yeah

[24:10] this is your time to mother them and it

[24:12] you can't choose how that's going to

[24:14] happen give it what you can I guess but

[24:16] you chose to have it happen

[24:17] well alongside your career so you can

[24:20] either just not be around or you can say

[24:22] hey look get in the

[24:23] and or the playout or whatever yeah and

[24:25] it's and listen it's I call it the ship

[24:27] show you know and ask any woman that

[24:29] takes her kids it's like you're putting

[24:32] on this hat and you're trying to be all

[24:33] together and do your career in your work

[24:35] and then you know your side jaw

[24:38] clenching whispering to your kid like

[24:40] you know be quiet you know or whatever

[24:42] it is like it's just but it's sort of

[24:44] beautiful because it's so chaotic and

[24:46] it's so honest and it keeps you from

[24:49] thinking like you're so together that

[24:52] it's that part is it's kind of it's so

[24:55] human but yeah because I personally you

[24:59] know laird always jokes like he's like

[25:01] you should have seen Gabby's car before

[25:02] she had kids like it was always clean

[25:05] and everyone's organizer and you know

[25:07] that goes out the window

[25:08] yeah now it's full of like rappers for

[25:11] getting bars and little toys yeah yeah

[25:14] and I'm like do we have to have the

[25:16] socks from tennis in the car for like I

[25:18] mean can somebody not pick me and it's

[25:21] the same conversations over and over

[25:22] right it's all that so again as much I

[25:26] could I go you know I call it the rack

[25:27] focus right it's in and out you're

[25:29] always doing that in your life hopefully

[25:30] you're looking above yourself and

[25:32] watching yourself and going low how are

[25:34] you navigating that and then sometimes

[25:35] you're in it you're just freaking out

[25:36] but it's it's doing that rack focusing

[25:40] and and trying to go this is this is

[25:43] that that important and it's not that

[25:44] important so this is really important

[25:46] and also laughing yourself because

[25:48] sometimes you're just running around

[25:49] like a almost like a lunatic and you go

[25:51] look at you you're kind of a lunatic

[25:53] yeah yeah it must be hard to separate

[25:55] yourself from that and then it sounds

[25:58] like you've got some skills from sports

[26:01] business that are helping you with your

[26:03] family life you mentioned looking at

[26:05] different externally looking at your

[26:07] situation yeah I think that's listen if

[26:10] I could if I could say to people

[26:12] sometimes the biggest gift is to back up

[26:16] and or go up and look over because then

[26:21] it gives you that perspective you know

[26:23] Neil and I were just talking about this

[26:24] like it's not about us you know like

[26:27] sometimes like you're going through the

[26:28] day and especially women right we

[26:30] hitting we're taking everything personal

[26:32] and sometimes to be just back up alone

[26:33] and go you know what yeah that's not

[26:35] about

[26:35] and and even like my problems like

[26:38] whatever problems I think I really have

[26:39] if I just back up a little and and go

[26:43] it's not really a problem it's fine you

[26:46] know it's it's not that big of a deal so

[26:48] I'm very thankful for that trait I think

[26:50] it is definitely probably helped my

[26:51] marriage a great deal

[26:52] we're staying married and I tell me to

[26:55] keep my sense of humor and and I and

[26:58] hopefully helps me save a lot of time on

[27:00] you know wasting energy and time on

[27:02] things that it ultimately is like who

[27:04] cares how often do you do things for

[27:06] yourself that are not wife / mother

[27:09] related you know my training has always

[27:13] been for me you know obviously was part

[27:15] of my job but now I look at my training

[27:17] is like the biggest gift and selfish

[27:18] thing I do for myself and and and again

[27:23] not in a corny way but it's like yo this

[27:25] is just for me the person not even the

[27:27] woman like just this human that's like

[27:30] getting to express this part and and

[27:33] doing something that I know no matter

[27:35] what whether I do it for 10 minutes or

[27:37] 90 minutes it's something really good

[27:40] for me and and so what used to be my job

[27:43] is also now becomes the thing that when

[27:47] I get that done I'm like okay I'm good I

[27:50] heard that when you are giving birth

[27:52] Owen Wilson called and wanted some chili

[27:54] wanted to hang out with learned

[27:55] something oh no no no no it's better

[27:57] than that so so I was as my third

[28:01] daughter and I was January first and so

[28:05] you know you think I'm like nobody goes

[28:07] into labor on January 1st it's probably

[28:08] not real but whatever so Laird went we

[28:10] were still living on Maui at the time

[28:12] and so Owen this is the premise of it

[28:15] though his brother Luke who's quite

[28:17] lovely had been maybe a couple months

[28:19] prior had done some activities with

[28:21] Laird so I think in brotherly

[28:23] competition he kind of bragged to Owen

[28:26] so when Owen came to Maui he spends a

[28:27] lot of time there he calls the house

[28:30] he's like hey yeah be its own Wilson is

[28:32] Laird there and I was like no actually

[28:34] he's in the you know at the beach and

[28:36] who keep it whatever and he goes I want

[28:37] to get into it and what are y'all doing

[28:39] later and I was like well I think I'm

[28:41] actually having a baby I'm in labor

[28:42] right now but it was still mellow you

[28:44] know I hadn't kicked up yet so low I

[28:46] said but you're welcome to go try and

[28:48] find them let's say

[28:48] like nine or ten in the morning well lo

[28:50] and behold like it you know two o'clock

[28:52] or whatever learned in him drive up he

[28:54] falls lair to our house in Maui

[28:56] then Laird he's like are you good and

[28:58] what I did it because I knew I was going

[29:00] to labor I made a big giant pot of chili

[29:01] and gluten-free cornbread and all this

[29:04] stuff because I thought okay least him

[29:06] and Rhys my middle we'll have some food

[29:08] and they'll be good and there's a woman

[29:10] to show them drive them out to the point

[29:12] shown pe'ahi which is a wave known as

[29:15] Jaws and they come back and now I'm

[29:18] starting to ramp up now my contractions

[29:20] are getting closer together the Chili's

[29:21] cooked they come in and I said alert

[29:24] okay you know I think it's happening and

[29:26] then and Owens like I'm starving and I

[29:29] go well I have chili here and so then

[29:32] he's like asking me about sour cream and

[29:34] my friend had flown in Jenn to take care

[29:36] of my daughter and layer when I was in

[29:37] having the baby and she is a volleyball

[29:40] player a strong girl and choose game

[29:41] she's like I'm gonna punch him out and I

[29:43] was like take it easy and you know I'm

[29:45] literally in labor like have you ever

[29:47] seen a girl in labor it's like okay one

[29:49] second and then you sort of have your

[29:50] little mini shock and then okay what was

[29:52] that question you know and so yeah so

[29:54] Owen was there yeah it was funny and

[29:56] it's like you're you're between

[29:57] contractions and he's like where's the

[29:59] sour cream you have sour cream was the

[30:01] fridge if I could if I was exaggerating

[30:03] it wouldn't be as funny but actually I'm

[30:05] dead serious

[30:06] um that's probably why he's good at his

[30:09] job you know what do you mean cuz I like

[30:12] these actors in there it's they're

[30:14] clueless thank you and I'm joking but

[30:16] it's like they sort of live in their

[30:18] mind and in their world and have a few

[30:20] friends that do that craft and they're

[30:22] not quite like that but part of them

[30:24] that's what sort of magical about them

[30:25] which like how is it over there you know

[30:28] as I'm like bent over in the kitchen I

[30:31] know yeah this is pretty funny it was

[30:33] actually what I mean listen at least on

[30:36] the way to the hospital like wow okay

[30:38] yeah I mean you're obviously really

[30:40] tough especially when it comes to that

[30:42] sort of thing you're the first female

[30:43] athlete to have her own shoe which I try

[30:45] to look at online but when I when I go

[30:48] with Gabrielle Reece Nike shoe all I

[30:50] found was like 8000 pictures of you in a

[30:52] sports bra or playing volleyball or

[30:54] something like that huh

[30:55] I was really fortunate you know but I

[30:57] always say that's like timing you know

[30:58] and and the other side of that that was

[31:01] really cool was they

[31:02] a tiger Hatfield was the designer of my

[31:04] shoe and so for anyone who's a sort of

[31:06] sneaker head if you will

[31:07] tinker was really the responsible person

[31:09] for the Jordans and that brand for a

[31:13] really long time and he's just a very

[31:15] talented guy so you know that's the

[31:18] success of that shoe was really also the

[31:21] fact that tinker designed the shoe

[31:23] obviously so we did a few seasons and

[31:25] the shoe did very very well and I was

[31:28] signed for for cross-training for

[31:29] training that was like when bo knows

[31:31] that whole thing was going on and so it

[31:34] was kind of better for me because

[31:35] volleyball so small but to cross over

[31:38] and really be signed for training that

[31:41] gave me a little bit more room and

[31:44] extension inside of Nike that I wouldn't

[31:47] have had if I was signed only for

[31:49] volleyball how do you deal with that

[31:51] that whole business seems like it's just

[31:52] loaded with ego and testosterone even in

[31:54] your personal life you got athlete's

[31:56] friends are you how do you turn it off

[31:58] or do you are just deal with it and

[32:00] that's a fact of life with those people

[32:02] well you know it's interesting I'll be

[32:04] honest with you at this time in our

[32:07] lives and I'll use Laird is sort of a

[32:09] partner in this you know generally we

[32:12] don't spend a lot of time with people

[32:14] that they are alphas but they have it's

[32:20] like they've got weird balance or at

[32:22] least they balance it when they're

[32:23] around us because you know my husband is

[32:25] pretty alpha SH and we always say

[32:29] everybody leaves it at the door because

[32:31] at the end of the day what we're trying

[32:32] to do is get together enjoy each other

[32:34] maybe learn from each other push each

[32:36] other those other types they kind of

[32:39] don't survive in our environment because

[32:42] both of us we can we have different

[32:45] gears you know if you will but because

[32:47] you start to realize that K the essence

[32:49] of life is you don't actually want to be

[32:52] the best or the smartest or the

[32:54] strongest in the room you want to be

[32:56] around those kind of people because then

[32:57] they're going to make you better but if

[33:00] you want to compete okay well we can do

[33:02] that too but that's not as productive

[33:05] but you know it's it's sometimes it's

[33:08] almost a sign of youth when you see a

[33:11] lot of that you go oh they haven't they

[33:12] haven't dialed it in yet and they're

[33:14] still a little afraid and there

[33:15] unsure of their place and so you you

[33:17] kind of understand it also a little bit

[33:20] I think that makes sense yeah it seems

[33:22] like you got to know when to bring in

[33:24] the competition when it's making you

[33:25] better and when it's actually not that's

[33:28] right because the competition when

[33:30] you're competing against somebody who

[33:31] can actually help you you're losing an

[33:33] opportunity to learn from them and

[33:35] connect and tap into their power so I

[33:39] think it's also it's a yielding that has

[33:41] to occur where each person can

[33:42] acknowledge and go hey you know what I

[33:43] did what you do or I respect you and

[33:45] then you can really get some stuff done

[33:47] versus I'm so great imma bad ass and you

[33:51] want to compete because then all of a

[33:52] sudden now you're going to rub against

[33:53] them versus learn from them and hook in

[33:55] with them I think it's interesting that

[33:57] you take that stuff into your marriage

[33:59] as well I know you're big on spending

[34:01] time with happily married good

[34:02] communicators and you credit that with

[34:05] this in part with the success of your

[34:07] marriage as well it sounds a lot like

[34:09] that Jim Rohn quote like you only go as

[34:11] high as your five closest friends or the

[34:13] people you spend time around or who you

[34:15] become things like that how does that

[34:17] apply in your relationships how are you

[34:18] how did you set that up and how does it

[34:20] help you like I'll just use Laird knives

[34:23] an example people don't you guys seem to

[34:25] really like each other so much and I

[34:26] said you know this is the thing I know

[34:28] about each of us individually is why

[34:30] bother like I'm not going to do it and

[34:33] be in this relationship and be with him

[34:35] if one I'm not coming at it with the

[34:37] attitude of how can I make his life

[34:39] better how can I help him out and also I

[34:41] want to enjoy it I want to respect him

[34:43] and otherwise I'd rather be alone I'd

[34:47] rather not be married and I know he's

[34:49] even more intense about it than I am

[34:51] is sort of saying if we're going to do

[34:55] this whatever this is so everybody has

[34:57] it many vistas in their in their life

[35:00] right it's work it's relationships it's

[35:02] self-care or whatever why not make it

[35:05] great if you can if you can sometimes

[35:08] you can't like if I've learned I got to

[35:10] a point where it's like this just

[35:12] probably isn't working and we've tried a

[35:14] lot of stuff okay there's a different

[35:16] thing but like wow if I can participate

[35:17] in this and try to make this great why

[35:20] would I not do that if I if I walk up to

[35:22] a counter and at the ticket counter or

[35:25] something and I'm going to interact with

[35:26] the person why would I not come out with

[35:28] it with

[35:29] like hey good afternoon how are you

[35:31] today okay I need some help like why so

[35:34] I think for me it's it's it's like

[35:35] you're always trying to operate in that

[35:39] place because then all of a sudden your

[35:41] world you're living on that frequency

[35:43] versus everywhere you go you've got

[35:45] conflict you can't stand your partner

[35:47] you can't stand yourself your life it

[35:50] sucks it's like okay I get it so what

[35:53] can you do to sort of say what how can I

[35:56] try to make it great and it's an amazing

[35:58] thing when people are personally

[36:00] accountable and say well I'll do my part

[36:02] and then see what happens your career is

[36:05] I think a lot larger than his if you're

[36:09] going to compare the two and I don't I'm

[36:11] doing that only because I know that you

[36:13] mentioned in your book that you kept

[36:14] making your personality a little bit

[36:15] smaller in order to kind of manage your

[36:18] relationship what was that like and what

[36:20] did that do for your relationship or

[36:22] two-year relationship you know I was

[36:24] young I was 25 when I met Larry but

[36:26] because of the nature of my job I got to

[36:28] kind of jump on things a little bit and

[36:30] I think it's really typical of females

[36:34] and I will say this and I've talked

[36:35] about this a little bit I was not

[36:37] groomed for success the way I grew up

[36:38] and so I don't know if you can relate to

[36:40] this but as things start to open up for

[36:43] you and things start to happen

[36:45] you it feels uncomfortable and you feel

[36:48] weird and guilty and you feel all this

[36:50] stuff that you got to figure out how to

[36:52] manage success right so then I get

[36:54] partnered with somebody who I knew

[36:56] intuitively laird is better at what he

[36:59] does and at what I do do I do a lot more

[37:02] I do a variety of things pretty well

[37:04] maybe more than him but what at what he

[37:08] does he's so much better like it's

[37:11] surfing than I ever was at volleyball

[37:13] right so I was dealing with that and I

[37:16] was a female and there was all this so

[37:19] there was this kind of natural thing

[37:20] where was like well I don't want to make

[37:21] him feel bad so I'll be less than and

[37:24] really what it came down to is once

[37:26] Laird sort of had his own footing and a

[37:29] couple Pat's on the back if you will it

[37:32] really

[37:33] and also maturity you know he grew up

[37:35] too and I think once men become a little

[37:39] more developed there's room like oh yeah

[37:42] honey go ahead kick some

[37:43] ask awesome Bravo but when you're

[37:45] younger maybe it makes you feel

[37:47] threatened so we were dealing with all

[37:49] these dynamics when we first got

[37:50] together and then we worked through it

[37:52] you know we almost got divorced and then

[37:53] it was like I you know we really loved

[37:56] each other let's try to work this out

[37:57] and then I think it's like we both kind

[38:00] of grew up a little bit and and and it

[38:02] took time I mean part of me you know I

[38:05] know sounds silly I kicked myself in the

[38:06] ass because I spent a lot of time

[38:08] apologizing for everything in my 20s to

[38:10] everybody teammates and you know

[38:13] everything because I felt bad for

[38:15] getting a lot of opportunities and

[38:17] getting singled out and I wish I hadn't

[38:20] done that like I wish I had just been

[38:21] like you know when I put my foot on the

[38:22] gas and I'm going to be as badass as I

[38:25] can be and everyone can suck it if they

[38:26] don't like it but I didn't you don't you

[38:29] know you're not doing a lot of us are

[38:30] not doing that especially women in their

[38:32] 20s some are it's true and I think a lot

[38:35] of people feel like they can't do that

[38:38] as well and I know that you also even

[38:40] more recently you've talked about how

[38:42] women being submissive in relationships

[38:44] is actually a sign of strength and not

[38:46] weakness depending on how it's done and

[38:49] one interesting quote that I pulled was

[38:51] we don't worry about men having it all

[38:53] so I don't know where we got this idea

[38:54] to have it all and you talk a lot about

[38:57] how women need to take care of

[38:58] themselves and their man

[39:00] have you taken flack for that from the

[39:02] sort of ultra feminist camp I unit I

[39:05] would imagine

[39:05] oh my gosh yeah I mean I got like oh you

[39:08] said back the feminist movement for 20

[39:11] years so there's a couple layers into

[39:12] that first of all I called the post

[39:15] feminist conversation because let's say

[39:17] if I was born just a little earlier

[39:19] remember I was born right at title a

[39:21] title nine so I am the first generation

[39:23] exactly 17 or 18 years after its past to

[39:26] get a full ride scholarship to go to

[39:28] college so there's things I didn't have

[39:29] to navigate that the women before me did

[39:32] so I understand from their point of view

[39:34] like what a sucky comment that is and

[39:37] plus the fact that the word submissive

[39:39] makes a lot of people nervous but the

[39:41] way I use it was in service and I I

[39:45] genuinely believe that and I was only

[39:49] speaking from my personal experience

[39:51] that the idea of serving your partner

[39:53] and serving your children and your

[39:55] family

[39:57] is a lot of work and takes and is a sign

[39:59] of great strength however I am NOT an

[40:02] idiot or say like throw yourself in

[40:04] front of the bus and do it because it's

[40:05] Archie Bunker's your husband it's like

[40:07] yo pick a good partner who's on the same

[40:10] page as you

[40:11] but for me to try to communicate what

[40:15] Laird should do is stupid Laird's gotta

[40:17] do what he should do not me teller you

[40:20] know well if you do this and I'll do

[40:22] that how about this I'm going to choose

[40:24] to be the best partner I can be I'm

[40:26] going to work my ass off I'm going to be

[40:27] try to be great for you and hopefully

[40:29] you'll do the same thing and by the way

[40:31] if you didn't we probably wouldn't be

[40:33] together for almost 22 years so I think

[40:35] it's we're also at a time where people

[40:37] are very combative and it's all like

[40:40] well no you're not going to get up on me

[40:42] and if you want this then or I'll give

[40:45] you this if you do that that doesn't

[40:47] work and by the way if you're with an

[40:49] alpha male that will blow up in your

[40:51] face in about seven minutes

[40:53] you don't tell an alpha male do this

[40:55] what you do is you hold your line you

[40:59] live the way you want to live and when

[41:01] times I have seen is you can inspire

[41:03] someone they can look at you and go wow

[41:05] she's really like on her game I'm going

[41:08] to get on my game not you better that

[41:11] doesn't work and so people I think they

[41:15] misunderstood and oversimplify what I

[41:17] was saying and I'm okay with that

[41:20] you know Katie Couric he's like you know

[41:22] in my house everything was equal and I

[41:24] was like really there's no such thing as

[41:26] equal in a house and then you you add

[41:27] some kids and it's definitely not equal

[41:30] and and even if it means that the woman

[41:34] is the Alpha there's no - male energies

[41:36] even in a straight or gay couple there's

[41:39] one masculine energy and one feminine

[41:41] and I was saying in my house I took the

[41:43] role of feminine because Lord Lord

[41:45] definitely takes the role of masculine

[41:47] and just finding that having that

[41:50] conversation of flow because then I walk

[41:51] out the door and then I'm back to alpha

[41:53] so how does that work and also once or

[41:56] twice a year Laird knows that's it like

[41:59] here's a line you want to cross the line

[42:00] let's go I'm down so it's not about

[42:03] being a doormat but it's also talking

[42:05] about there's I think great strength in

[42:08] yielding I always use the analogy the

[42:10] grocery store you're coming down the

[42:13] aisle I'm going down the aisle the other

[42:14] way if I see you guess what even if

[42:17] you're younger whatever it's like I'll

[42:20] move to the side to let you go it'll

[42:22] take me three seconds and it's a nice

[42:24] gesture could I go through you over you

[42:27] I could but why and so I guess I think

[42:33] you know we read this book and it talks

[42:36] about it's called natural born heroes

[42:38] and it says hey listen to be a true

[42:39] warrior you have to be compassionate so

[42:42] we're in a culture right now where

[42:43] everyone's forgetting about service and

[42:45] kindness and all these things that

[42:47] really are powerful yeah I think there's

[42:50] something to that and it seems like

[42:51] coming from a place of power is more

[42:55] effective in the end then coming at it

[42:57] from a place of well the opposite are

[43:00] some sort of mishmash of the two and

[43:02] especially when you're dealing with

[43:04] somebody like Larry I know you mentioned

[43:05] in the book you call him the weatherman

[43:06] because he's super moody and yeah you

[43:10] can't take responsibility for someone

[43:12] else's happiness like that and I know

[43:14] earlier in your marriage one of the

[43:15] things that was causing the problems was

[43:16] you had this mindset that well if he

[43:18] really loved me he'd be happy with me

[43:20] most of the time I'm responsible for

[43:22] making him happy you just can't do that

[43:23] to yourself well you can't you can't do

[43:26] that it's it's um it's a kind of a

[43:28] ridiculous notion to think that you you

[43:32] can make someone else happy and that

[43:34] someone else can make you happy you can

[43:36] improve someone else's life you can

[43:37] inspire people you can have that back at

[43:39] you but we all sort of have to work out

[43:42] our own stuff if you will and what's

[43:45] been interesting is to watch layer over

[43:47] the years like his moods are and I don't

[43:50] know if it's the tenderizing of our

[43:51] children but you know he's really

[43:53] leveled out and it's a very I think it's

[43:55] an interesting thing to watch men grow

[43:57] up because then all of a sudden it's

[43:58] like young guys come they train he's a

[44:00] guy they'll have you go you know it's

[44:02] like an interesting thing with I think

[44:04] you learn to back up and I believe this

[44:07] is an adult

[44:08] it's like my kids tell me stuff that of

[44:10] course I know and I'm like oh that's

[44:12] interesting but I don't need to for them

[44:14] to know I'm right or that I knew that

[44:16] already it's like I don't care

[44:18] you know it's there comes a point where

[44:20] you you sort of surrender to to

[44:23] everyone needing to know how smart and

[44:26] on it you are it's like I don't really

[44:28] give a [ __ ] it's like I got it you know

[44:30] I'm busy I got stuff to do and whether

[44:33] you get it or not or you know and and I

[44:35] and a big thing as a woman was not

[44:37] taking it personal and and understanding

[44:40] that that intensity and Laird was also

[44:42] attached to about 50 of the things that

[44:44] I loved about them and so cool

[44:48] okay yeah well great I mean I'm glad

[44:50] that it's worked out so well so far I'm

[44:52] glad that we met recently and became

[44:54] friends because I think you're an

[44:55] awesome person I'm glad you took your

[44:57] time here to be on the show with us I

[44:58] really appreciate it well I really

[45:01] appreciate the work that you do and and

[45:03] I'm happy you know for you and for the

[45:06] message that you're putting out with the

[45:07] show so thank you so much for having me

[45:09] obviously it's there's a lot of stuff

[45:11] going on in the world at the moment and

[45:13] I actually think that I always say the

[45:16] Lord you know we really have to fortify

[45:17] ourselves more and and what I mean by

[45:19] that is you know just to encourage

[45:21] people to try to keep taking care of

[45:23] themselves and and also to be I know

[45:27] it's so corny like ob+ but I think the

[45:30] world needs sort of some kind of like

[45:34] love positivity and and and also remind

[45:39] them that like it's short so if you got

[45:41] something you want to do and you haven't

[45:42] taken that risk if you can do it and

[45:44] calculate it and smart way without

[45:45] ruining your life you got to go for it

[45:48] great message thank you very much Aloha

[45:53] you