Reach Out and Touch Someone: Breaking the Touch Barrier

Touch BarrierOne of the simplest ways to start levelling up your social game is touch. Touch is one of the areas of dating that men seem to feel the least sure about. They don’t know how they can break the touch barrier and they might not even know that they need to. Next time you go out for the night, reach out and touch someone; you’ll be amazed at what a difference it can make when done the right way.

Why We Want to Break the Touch Barrier

Breaking the touch barrier can rapidly increase intimacy between you and the woman you’re talking to. There’s a lot of power in touch and being the guy she has that physical connection with can make all the difference in the world when it comes to getting her number, getting the date or even getting her to come back to your place after last call. Finally, when you touch her you’re sending a subtle message that it’s OK for her to touch you back. I’m always amazed at how quickly things progress once I break the touch barrier.

Touching the Right Way

Sometimes men are afraid of how they will come across if they touch a woman. There are two keys to making sure you’re touching in the right way, and they’re both very simple.

First, we want to be touching in a playful way. This can be as simple as tapping her on the shoulder opposite you and greeting her with a smile when she figures out it was you that touches her. Overall, you want to keep things light and playful when you’re in the early stages of an interaction. This applies to touch as well as talk.

Second, you want to touch her in “safe” areas. This includes the upper back, the shoulders, the arms and the hands. We call these areas “safe” because, unlike other parts of the body, there’s nothing terribly sexual about them.

When you go out tonight, try playfully touching a woman on the shoulder after you’ve had a bit of banter. See how it goes.

What Does Touching Do?

When you touch, it might help you to remember what you’re trying to accomplish by touching. Here’s a few things you’re trying to get done by breaking the touch barrier:

  • Conveys a Sense of Fun: Remember, we want our touch to be playful and fun. Touch is a powerful sense and communicating this with more than words and body language will seriously accelerate things.
  • Gets Her Comfortable With Your Touch: You want to touch her. Touching her in a light and playful way gets her used to being touched by you.
  • Gives Her Permission to Touch You Back: A lot of times, all it takes is a little simple touch from you to get her all over you. Touching her sends the signal that it’s OK for the two of you to touch. She’ll get the message.
  • Breaks Down Barriers: Touching bridges a gap between you and the woman you’re talking to. The physical connection helps the emotional connection between you deepen. Not only will she feel more comfortable touching you, she’ll feel more comfortable talking to you.

Level Up Your Game By Breaking the Touch Barrier

Just a little bit of touch will have your game taking off. Try it tonight and see how it works out for you. I guarantee that you’ll be glad you did.

If you want to know more simple ways you can level up your game tonight, sign up for The Art of Charm Academy. For less than a dollar you can learn a simple and effective method that will have you becoming the ladies’ man you’ve always wanted to be.

AJ Harbinger - author of 1048 posts on The Art of Charm

AJ Harbinger is one of the world’s top relationship development experts. His company, The Art of Charm, is a leading training facility for top performers that want to overcome social anxiety, develop social capital and build relationships of the highest quality. Raised by a single father, AJ felt a strong desire to learn about relationships and the elements that make them successful. However, this interest went largely untapped for many years. Following the path set out for him by his family, AJ studied biology in college and went on to pursue a Ph.D. in Cancer Biology at the University of Michigan. It was at this time that he began to feel immense pressure from the cancer lab he worked in and began to explore other outlets for expression. It was at this point that The Art of Charm Podcast was born.

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