The Basics of Female Body Language

Learning to read female body language is a crucial skill. Understand female body language and you’ll know when to take things to the next level with a woman – and when to slow things down. If you want to further develop this skill here are a few tips for reading female body language.

How to read body language

Reading female body language isn’t really about spotting specific gestures and movements. It’s about spotting changes in a woman’s behaviors. So before you start looking for meaningful cues she’s interested you’ve got to establish a “baseline” of her typical body language. How she deviates from the baseline will then give you a glimpse into how she is feeling. (This tip, along with many others in this article, were learned from body language expert Joe Navarro)

For example, some women are naturally flirty and will do a lot of touching during conversation. So if you think a girl is interested in you just because she’s touching you then you may be mistaken. What you want to look for is how a girl touches you compared with how she touches everyone else. If she touches you more frequently than everyone else, or in more personal areas (she touches your chest while just touching everyone else on the arm) that difference is how you know she’s interested.

Signs of discomfort

One thing to keep in mind when looking for changes in female body language is if a woman “freezes up”. This is a signal that shows discomfort, anxiety, or even insecurity. It’s also one that can be spotted on any part of a woman’s body. For example you may notice a woman playfully wiggling her feet under her chair – and then abruptly stop. Seeing this sudden change can let you know that something has made her uncomfortable.

Signs of freezing are a good thing to look for when you want to escalate with a woman. If a woman freezes up when you touch her (while avoiding eye contact) then it’s a sign she’s not yet ready to go any further. At times like this it’s a good idea to step back and engage in some playful banter. Once she feels more comfortable with you, try again.

Signs she’s engaged

The more positive body language you see from a woman the more interested and engaged she is. What is positive body language? If the girl is facing you directly and leaning in then she’s showing you positive body language. If she’s leaning away or angles her body away from you, she’s showing negative body language.

The cool thing about positive and negative body language is that you can actually use it to create attraction with women. If a woman is giving you attitude or saying things you don’t like you can respond simply with a bit of negative body language. Angle your body away and let her see that she’s losing your attention. This shows you’re a high-value guy who simply doesn’t put up with that kind of behavior. As a result you’re going to come across as that much more attractive to her and any other woman watching.

Eye contact is a strong sign she’s engaged. Women don’t hold eye contact with men they don’t want to talk to. So if a woman is comfortable enough to hold your gaze, she finds you attractive.


Just like positive body language barriers can be a great way to see if a girl is gaining or losing interest in you. If she enjoys talking to you, feels comfortable with you, and is hoping to connect with you, then she’ll start removing barriers. If she’s feeling uncomfortable or distant, then she’s going to construct barriers between you.

What do these barriers look like? They could be anything. A woman crossing her arms or holding a something across her chest (a drink, bag, book, etc) are all forms of barriers. If you’re sitting across the table from a woman she may move her water glass directly between you to construct a barrier, or place it to the side to remove it. If she’s sitting she can create a barrier by crossing her legs away from you, or open up to you by crossing her legs in your direction.

Signs she’s flirting with you

The female body language signs most guys are interested in are the signs a woman is flirting with you. Things like strong eye contact, twirling her hair, and the positive body language signs mentioned earlier can all be signs the girl is flirting with you.

But as mentioned before merely spotting these behaviors doesn’t mean the girl is definitely interested. What you want to see is an increase in these behaviors from her usual baseline. If you see multiple flirting signs from a woman that all deviate from typical behavior, then you can be far more certain that she’s interested in you.


Female body language can sometimes be tough to pick up on. Micro-expressions are a perfect example. This is when an expression will flash across a woman’s face for just a fraction of a second (men do it, too). If you’re not paying attention they can be very difficult to spot. And that would be a shame as micro-expressions are a very accurate gauge for how a woman feels.

Any facial expression can briefly appear as a micro-expression. If a woman is happy but trying to conceal it, it’s only a matter of time until a smile briefly flashes across her face. If she’s trying to hide a negative emotion that will eventually be revealed as well. She may briefly crinkle her nose (the sign for disgust) or curl just one corner of her lip back (contempt). If you see a micro-expression that suggests one of these negative emotions it’s probably time to change environments or topic of conversation.

Give women what they want

If you want to put this knowledge of female body language to good use and start meeting and attracting more women, the Art of Charm can help. Click here to learn how.

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