743: Relationship Goals: Love, Friends & Work

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About This Episode

Smartphones and the apps that exist on them have blown the doors wide open when it comes to creating options in your dating life as well as giving you the (sometimes false) perception of keeping in touch with friends. But what are the drawbacks of relying on all these algorithms to meet new people, how can you ensure you’re actually nurturing the personal and professional relationships you already have, and what does the science tell us about the current state of our social lives?

What to Listen For

  • Are you more likely to meet your significant other on your own or through friends, and what does this mean for you?
  • How have dating apps both improved and damaged the world of dating?
  • Why can information overload have a negative impact on your love life and what can you do to control it?
  • What are emotional bids and how can you use them to improve the relationships in your life, both platonic and romantic?
  • What are Glue Guys/Girls and how do they hold teams together in a corporate/work environment, and what can you do to become one, reducing your chance of getting laid off and increasing your chance of getting that raise/promotion?
  • How do gratitude and asking for help play an important role in the formation of strong bonds, and how can you start using both today to improve your relationships?
  • Why is the act of validating others’ feelings so powerful, whether in a personal or professional setting, and why should you start doing it immediately?
  • What one thing can you do to defuse gossip on the spot when someone can’t seem to stop gossiping to you about someone?

At a surface level, romantic and professional relationships couldn’t appear more different: the intimacy, the way you speak to one another, the activities you engage in, etc.

But the beauty of human connection is on a fundamental level we all want the same things. We want to be appreciated, we want to be valued, and we want to feel as if our thoughts and feelings matter.

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Resources from this Episode

“The National Survey of Health and Social Life” aka The Chicago Sex Survey

Why Emotional Connection Makes or Breaks a Relationship Episode 719

Turning Toward Emotion Episode 720

How to Improve Your Workplace Communication Episode 721

What Matters Most in a Difficult Conversation Episode 722

Wall Street Journal: Baseball’s Winning Glue Guys

Beyond Reciprocity: Gratitude and Relationships in Everyday Life

Social Isolation in America

Psychopath, Sociopath, or Idiots:

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

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AJ Harbinger - author of 1139 posts on The Art of Charm

AJ Harbinger is one of the world’s top relationship development experts. His company, The Art of Charm, is a leading training facility for top performers that want to overcome social anxiety, develop social capital and build relationships of the highest quality. Raised by a single father, AJ felt a strong desire to learn about relationships and the elements that make them successful. However, this interest went largely untapped for many years. Following the path set out for him by his family, AJ studied biology in college and went on to pursue a Ph.D. in Cancer Biology at the University of Michigan. It was at this time that he began to feel immense pressure from the cancer lab he worked in and began to explore other outlets for expression. It was at this point that The Art of Charm Podcast was born.

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