What To Say To a Girl You Want to Date

what to say to a girlYou’ve been seeing her for a while, but your feelings have started to grow. Now you want to make things exclusive. Eventually every casual relationship reaches a tipping point; Either things get serious or things end. Some men have trouble handing the transition. You might not know what to say to a girl you want to date, but fear not: A lot of it is just keeping at what you’re already doing.

Keep It Light

The best thing you can do while things are getting more serious between you two is to keep things fun. She likes you for who you are, so in some ways it’s easier to keep things light than ever. You don’t need to worry about trying to impress her — you already have. Just continue to be the same fun, playful guy she’s gotten to know over the last several weeks.

Showing Appreciation

Every guy knows that women love compliments. Still, you might worry that you’re overdoing it some times. Here’s a couple pieces of advice when it comes to showing interest in a woman you want to date:

  • While on dates, mention that you enjoy seeing her once or twice at high points during the date. Other than that, just focus on being the moment.
  • Fewer things show a girl that you’re interested more than picking up the phone and calling her. Whether it’s to confirm a date or just to chat about your day, this can really set you apart from the rest of the pack. The phone is the best way to talk to the girl you want to date.
  • Gifts aren’t a bad idea, but keep them small. Emphasize the thought that you put into the gift rather than the price tag.

Showing appreciation for a woman and putting her on a pedestal are not the same thing. You want her to know that you like her. Don’t be afraid to find small but meaningful ways to show it.

Deepening Connections

When you first meet a woman you tend to talk about shared interests. For example, you’ll talk about the types of music that you like, hobbies, activities, movies and that sort of thing. As the relationship deepens, the connections you two have also deepens. To get the connection between the two of you even stronger, it’s time to start talking about some “heavier” things.

Don’t worry, they aren’t going to be downers. I’m talking about things like your plans for the future, your values, your aspirations and your dreams. Ask her what she wanted to be when she was a little girl and how that changed as she got older. Talk about where she would like to be in five years. Tell her where you want your career to go. For there to be a long-term connection, you two are going to have to have some overlap here and besides, it’s fun to dream together.

Telling Her What You Want

For her to know that you want to date her, you’re going to have to be direct about it. After all, there’s no way for her to know what you want unless you tell her. As the man, it’s important that you take charge in moving things forward. A great way to do this is to not even make it a question. Tell her that you’ve noticed that things are getting more serious between you two. Then say that you think it’s time things got even more serious. That kind of direct, take-charge attitude is what it’s all about — the perfect way to move your relationship forward.

AJ Harbinger - author of 1114 posts on The Art of Charm

AJ Harbinger is one of the world’s top relationship development experts. His company, The Art of Charm, is a leading training facility for top performers that want to overcome social anxiety, develop social capital and build relationships of the highest quality. Raised by a single father, AJ felt a strong desire to learn about relationships and the elements that make them successful. However, this interest went largely untapped for many years. Following the path set out for him by his family, AJ studied biology in college and went on to pursue a Ph.D. in Cancer Biology at the University of Michigan. It was at this time that he began to feel immense pressure from the cancer lab he worked in and began to explore other outlets for expression. It was at this point that The Art of Charm Podcast was born.

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in Art of Dating, Flirting And Attraction

2 Comments on “What To Say To a Girl You Want to Date”

  1. My girl wants to date but doesnt know it yet. I keep giving her hints but like she just wont let me date her. Shes too stuck up on her ex that lives in Canada. I’ve tried to make her realize that she wants me and not him but she just wont except it. She ares to much about him regardless of the awesome head!

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