Online Dating Message Tips

When you’re using an online dating site, everything begins with a message. If you write a strong, solid message to start off with, you’re laying the kind of firm foundation that’s going to help you get her attention and get the date. Here are fiveonline dating message tips to show you the ins and outs of Internet dating.

Start With Flirting

You might feel little trepidations about flirting with her right off the bat, but that’s what we recommend. Why? Because being flirtatious, playful and fun serves two purposes: First, it’s a lot easier to get into a conversation when things start out light and fun, as opposed to heavy “job interview” type questions. Second, it’s a confident move, which is always the place you want to operate from, no matter where you’re meeting a girl.

Reference Her Profile

It might surprise you to find out that nine out of ten times, the guy isn’t referencing anything in her profile — he just starts talking at her. Referencing something that you see in her online dating profile is basically the online dating equivalent of active listening. You’re letting her know that you’re paying attention to her. What’s more, you’re jumping to the head of the pack by letting her know that the two of you have something in common.

Get Her Facebook Profile

Online dating profiles are basically the most polished version of ourselves that we put forward. A more rough-hewn version of ourselves appears on more traditional social networking sites, like Facebook and Twitter. This is where you can get a sense of the type of person she really is, as opposed to the type of person she wants you to think she is on her dating profile. The two might be very similar, but they won’t be exactly the same. You can also spot a lot of red flags here that might not be as apparent on her more carefully crafted media.

Use Your Emoticons

A lot of guys don’t like using emoticons. Here’s the thing, though: Girls love using them. Most of our communication isn’t about the words we use. On the contrary, it’s about the tone of our voice and our body language. That all gets stripped away when you’re only talking to a girl through text. You can begin to restore some (but not all) of that with emoticons and emojis. Have some favorites always on deck.

Seal the Date

Of course, the whole point of online dating is to actually go on a date. So you want to try to seal that date sooner rather than later. Once you hit a high point, tell her that the two of you should meet up to engage in some mutually interesting activity together. If she doesn’t go for the first idea, don’t be afraid to try another time or date.

These online dating message tips should give you a solid starting point for making that first impression.

AJ Harbinger - author of 1124 posts on The Art of Charm

AJ Harbinger is one of the world’s top relationship development experts. His company, The Art of Charm, is a leading training facility for top performers that want to overcome social anxiety, develop social capital and build relationships of the highest quality. Raised by a single father, AJ felt a strong desire to learn about relationships and the elements that make them successful. However, this interest went largely untapped for many years. Following the path set out for him by his family, AJ studied biology in college and went on to pursue a Ph.D. in Cancer Biology at the University of Michigan. It was at this time that he began to feel immense pressure from the cancer lab he worked in and began to explore other outlets for expression. It was at this point that The Art of Charm Podcast was born.

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