How to Flirt with Women

Knowing how to flirt with women is perhaps the most indispensable skill that a man can have when it comes to getting girls to like you. If you feel like you don’t know how to flirt with women, don’t worry: You’re not alone and it’s not like they offered a class on it at college. Keep reading for a guide that will help beginners and men with some knowledge of how to flirt with women to level up their game and become even more adept at the bar, club or anywhere.

Young couple dancing

Keep It Playful

One of the things that you have to remember about flirting is that it’s supposed to be light and playful. This is true even when there’s more of an overt sexual overtone about things. Keeping things light and playful is good for two reasons: First, it allows her to relax. Second, it allows you to show off your sense of playful humor, something that nearly all women find attractive. Another benefit of keeping your flirting playful? It allows you to push the envelope in a way that more “serious” conversation doesn’t.

Make Her Smile

One of the best things you can do in any situation with a girl is to make her smile. Do this when you’re flirting with light, playful humor, but also with the occasional sincere compliment. Only offer compliments that you actually believe and try to keep them about things other than her physical appearance. After all, she already knows that you’re attracted to her. Let her know that you like her for who she is on the inside.

Question -> Answer -> Response

The thing that underpins everything we teach at The Art of Charm about banter and is the question, answer response process. This is something that helps with one of the biggest problems that we run into: Guys running out of things to say. Basically, how it works is:

  • Question: You ask her something. It can be serious. It can be playful. Whatever seems appropriate at the time
  • Answer: She gives you her answer. You have no control over how this goes, but you do have control over how you respond.
  • Respond: Again, whether your response is serious or playful depends on the situation. Whatever it is that you decide, however, you should respond in such a way that she understands that you listened to her.

This process helps you to communicate effectively, not run out of things to say and let her know that she’s being heard. It is the exact opposite of using canned answers for flirting.

Reach Out and Touch Her

A lot of guys fall short in the flirting game because they’re afraid of touch. But the thing is, touch is one of the best assets in your flirtation toolbox. Touch doesn’t just bridge the gap between you and your girl. It also gives her permission to start touching you. Worried about using touch in flirtation? Don’t be. There are very safe areas to touch a woman, like her hands, arms and upper back that allow you to give her some touch without making things awkward, weird or “creepy.”

Give Her Room to Want You More

One of the best ways to flirt with a woman is to get her wanting you even more than she already does. How do you do that? Walk away for a bit. Go grab a drink, walk around the room or maybe even spend a little time flirting with another woman at the bar. If you do this, you might be surprised at how quickly she starts chasing after you rather than the other way around.

You should also be a bit challenging, pushing back. This is not only a fun way to flirt, it’s also a way to establish that you’re not interested in just any woman. Being challenging shows that you’re selective. Being selective increases your value. Creating a little bit of distance between the two of you is a great way to get her to try and pull you back a bit.

Escalation for Gentlemen

When it comes to flirting, you want to escalate things, but you also want to be a gentleman about it. Push the envelope, but also respect her boundaries. As a man, you want to be moving things forward. As a woman, it’s her job to put up barriers and tell you when things are moving too quickly. Don’t be afraid to escalate, but also pay attention to and respect her boundaries.

You want to be sexual, first and foremost so that she knows that you’re interested. Nine times out of ten when a guy ends up in the “friend zone” it’s because he didn’t make his intentions known. He was funny, yes, and maybe even a little challenging, but he did not

Flirting with women doesn’t come naturally to a lot of men, but it’s also something that men can easily pick up and learn. One of the best ways to learn how to flirt with a women you like is to come to The Art of Charm Boot Camp. Give us one week and we can make you into the man you’ve always wanted to be but never thought that you could become.

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If you’re tired of getting rejected and chasing women then…