Why You don’t Need a Six Pack to Make an Impression

Physical attraction is only a small piece of getting a girl interested in you.  Things like six-pack abs may get a girl to turn her head, but physical attraction alone won’t do much else.  If you want to make a lasting impression, forget the crunches and focus on developing the following qualities instead:


Imagine you already had that six pack – or whatever trait you think you need to attract women.  When you see yourself as already having that trait how do you feel?  Confident?  Like you can walk up to any woman and get her attracted without having to do anything?

That feeling of confidence that comes with knowing you don’t need anything to get women attracted to you is exactly what will make you attractive to women.  The fact is confidence attracts women better than any defined muscle group ever could.  So you don’t actually need the six pack.  You can generate that feeling of confidence simply by “act as if” you already have it.  That confidence then will then go a long way in getting women attracted to you.


More important than physical attraction is the attraction created by having integrity.  A guy willing to own what he says and stay true to himself is going to come across as incredibly attractive to women.  It shows women you’re a guy they can trust, respect, and form a real relationship with.

A big piece of showing integrity is committing to your interactions with women.  If you want to talk to a girl, walk up to her directly, make eye contact (while giving a warm smile) and say hi.  If an awkward silence pops up during the conversation, own it.  Instead of using it as an excuse to eject from the conversation, point it out and make a joke of it. It can be tough at times but if you just hang in there and commit to your interactions you’d be surprised just how far they can go.


A girl might enjoy looking at a six pack for a little bit, but if that guy’s got nothing else going on besides physical attraction then she’s going to get bored fast.  If there’s a guy around who’s fun, charming, and makes her feel good about herself, then she’s going to ditch the guy with the abs and go with the fun, charming guy 10 times out of 10.

The key to charming women and making women feel good when they’re around you is maintaining a positive, upbeat attitude.  In your conversations avoid any type of complaining, whining, gossiping, or putting people down.  Instead, stay focused on the positives.  Talk about traits you like in people and the things that are going well in your life and the lives of those around you.  By staying focused on the positives you’ll be able to lift the mood of anyone you come in contact with (including attractive women).  As a result they’ll want to be around you more and more.


Ambition is a trait that’s often overlooked when talking about attraction.  But the fact is women want a guy who is going somewhere with his life and makes a positive impact on those around him.  This doesn’t mean however that you must already be a huge success in whatever you’re doing.  So long as you’re making strides to be successful in something that matters to you women will be impressed.  In the long run that ambition can take you much further with women than mere physical attraction.

Be high-value

It’s easy to get confused when thinking about what it means for a guy to be “high-value”.  Lots of guys think that being high-value means being rich or good-looking.  Others view it as being the “Apha Male” that tries to assert dominance by controlling those around him.  But in reality being high-value has nothing to do with any of those things.  What it’s really about is cooperation.

A guy who can cooperate and get along with others is the true Alpha Male.  He’s not worried about “establishing dominance” because he knows he’s got nothing to prove to anyone.  If you want to become that high-value alpha male, all you’ve got to do is be friendly and cooperative with those around you.  Look to brighten everyone’s day and focus on what you can give to people, not what you can get from them.  A guy like this is a rare find, and is the type of man women want to be with.


All women want a guy who can make them laugh.  It doesn’t matter how much physical attraction a guy can generate, if he can’t get a girl laughing then she’s going to find someone that’s more fun to be around.  It’s as simple as that.

The thing about attracting women with your sense of humor is you don’t have to be funny all the time.  Nor do you need to be the funniest guy in the room.  Just be able to crack a joke and get her laughing now and then.  Easing the tension and boosting her mood with a well-timed joke or comment is really all it takes to win a girl over with your sense of humor.

A great way to use your sense of humor to attract women is to make fun of yourself.  Not in a self-deprecating way, but in a playful teasing kind of way.  By doing this you show you don’t take yourself too seriously, which will go a long way in helping her relax and feel comfortable being around you.

How to build attraction

For an in-depth look on how to develop some of the qualities mentioned above and use them to attract women, check out the Art of Charm Insiders toolkit.  With over ten hours of free audio content this free toolkit will help you develop the skills you need to get and keep the girl.  Sign up now by clicking the “Free Download Here” button to the right of this article.

Brian M - author of 191 posts on The Art of Charm

Once he realized attraction was something he could learn, Brian spent way too much of his free time studying and practicing everything he could find on the subject. He stumbled across The Art of Charm podcast and eventually signed up for an AoC bootcamp. Excited by the progress he's made in his own life since the program, he decided to start writing for AoC to help other guys do the same. By writing about interpersonal dynamics, he’s finally able to put that psychology degree to good use.


in Art of Dating, Flirting And Attraction

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