Dating tips that attract girls are the first things a guy looks for when he wants to improve his dating life. But even if a guy knows how to attract women he may still find it difficult. There are plenty of guys who have read the e-books and advice columns, yet anytime they see a girl they’re attracted to they find a reason not to approach her. It’s not just at bars, it’s everywhere. He’ll pass by a hot girl at the coffee shop and tell himself “that situation wasn’t right. I’ll get the next one”. In majority of these instances the situation is actually perfect. The trouble is he’s simply not ready.
Let’s say you’re going out on Friday night. You’ve spent all day in a cube working on TPS reports, go home, muck around for a bit and a few hours later you meet your friends at a bar. You see a group of girls and want to go talk to them. But if you haven’t been social and have barely talked to anyone all day, then it’s going to be a difficult approach to make. It’d be like if you took the SAT’s the minute you rolled out of bed. You could try, but you’ll have a much easier time if you got your mind ready first.
Walking up cold and being social with a stranger can feel weird (and if it’s an attractive girl or a group of people, it can add that much more pressure) and lots of guys feel like they have to force themselves to make these kinds of approaches. It’s especially hard for guys that have anti-social jobs and spend their days away from people. If a guy spends all day at his desk working in front a computer it’s going to be damn near impossible to suddenly flip that switch and become a social, charming, charismatic guy. Any guy who expects that from himself is likely expecting too much. He should look to take things a bit easier, and gradually work himself into that social frame of mind.
Think of it this way: You wouldn’t walk into a gym and just start lifting, would you? If you’re looking to strengthen your muscles you’d warm up first. That way whatever exercise you’re doing becomes much easier and smoother.
Being social is the same thing. Think of it as a muscle that needs to be warmed up (every day!) in order to work smoothly. Although most dating tips to attract girls skip over this point, it can make all the difference in the world.
Instead of looking to flip that switch the minute you hit the bar, look to get that social muscle going before you even arrive. Talk to strangers as they pass you by on the street. You don’t even have to engage them, something as simple as “cool hat” will already help to get things moving. Maybe you can stop in your favorite dive bar (or whatever social environment you’re comfortable in) on the way, grab a quick drink while chatting up the bartender and whoever happens to sit next to you.
If you can’t put yourself in a position to talk to people face-to-face, then call up a friend and talk for a bit. It’ll help get you in that social mindset much better than zoning out in front of the TV, or getting lost in your own thoughts.
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