Want to know how to charm her? Well you can start by forgetting what society has to say about charming women. Clever lines, fancy dinners, and movie-star good looks simply aren’t needed. All it really takes to charm women is a winning personality and a little bit of conversation skills. To learn how to charm a girl by developing these traits, read on.
How to charm a girl with your attitude
A big piece in learning how to charm a woman is getting the right attitude. After all if you’re positive, upbeat, and fun to be around, then women will be drawn to you naturally.
If you find it difficult to relax and be fun around attractive women (and find yourself feeling fearful and anxious instead), then you’ll want to develop what the Art of Charm coaches refer to as abundance mentality. This means having the belief that there are countless beautiful women interested in dating you at all times. Think about it, if you already knew every girl at the bar wanted you, would you be nervous talking to any particular girl? Not likely. Get this belief ingrained in your mind and you’ll have no problem being relaxed and fun when talking with women.
The absolute best way to get this abundance mentality mindset is to go out and approach women on a regular basis. Spend a full 30 minutes every day out approaching women. If approaching women is too hard on your own, enlist help from friends. Give a friend something important (like your car keys or computer) and tell him not to return it to you until you’ve approached 3 women that day. Meeting women on a regular basis like this ensures you won’t get too nervous over any individual interaction.
Make her laugh
Making a girl laugh is a great way to ease tension and get a girl to enjoy your company. If you’re not sure how to get a girl laughing, a great fallback is a banter technique known as push-pull. This is where you “push” the girl away by disqualifying yourself as a potential partner, while simultaneously “pulling” her in by expressing your interest in her. For example, you could say something like “You’re awesome… we need to find you a man”. This get her laughing and as a bonus introduces and element of playful flirting into the conversation.
(For more tips on how to make a girl laugh, click here and check out the Art of Charm Podcasts on Banter.)
Get her turned on
A great way to get a woman turned on and build that sexual chemistry is through touch. If you’ve just met the girl, start slow using light, playful taps with the back of your hand and touch her just above her elbow. This breaks the touch barrier and gets a woman used to the idea of you touching her. As the conversation with the woman continues, you can touch different areas (moving to upper arm, back, hip, and leg) while resting your hand on her for longer periods of time.
Get women to see you again
Charming women into seeing you again can be incredibly simple. It doesn’t take special lines or anything; all you have to do is be open and honest with what you’re feeling and what you want. Saying “I like you want to take you out Thursday” or “I want to kiss you right now” is often all you need to take things to the next level. Why? Because women appreciate the honesty and the courage it takes to be that open and vulnerable. Plus, it shows you are the kind of man who’s willing to go after what he wants – which is an incredibly attractive trait for men to have.
To make this work it’s incredibly important that you are not attached to any outcome. If she says yes to your request for a date – that’s great. If she says no – that’s okay too (after all, a “no” really just means “not right now”). Be sure to give her the freedom to respond however she does and accept any response. The great thing is if she says “no” and sees that you’re able to take that rejection in stride, it shows her tremendous confidence. That alone may tip the scales and get the girl attracted to you.
(If you’re not sure what to do once you get that date, check out the articles on how to charm her with dating tips for men here: https://theartofcha.wpengine.com/dating-tips/)
The most important piece of how to charm a girl
By far the most important thing to keep in mind when learning how to charm a girl is this: Charming a girl isn’t about getting a girl to see how great and amazing you are. It’s about getting the woman to see how great and amazing she is. If you can make a girl feel good about herself whenever she’s around you then she’s going to want to be around you as much as possible.
That’s why a simple, yet overlooked piece in how to charm a girl is to just listen. When she’s talking, don’t focus on your next funny line or what story you’re going to tell. Drop in and really listen to what she says. Take a genuine interest in who she is (what was her childhood was like? What does she want to do with her life? What she’s passionate about?). Taking the time to really get a sense of who this girl is can be flattering for her. It will get her to feel good about herself and as she’s opening up she’ll begin to feel more connected to you.