767: How to master communication in a relationship

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Relationships are a two-way street, but when it comes to communication it’s important to understand people have a variety of preferences when it comes to how love and affection are given and received, so what are those preferences, how can you identify what someone’s preferences are, and how can you implement all of this information to build new relationships and strengthen existing ones?

What to Listen For

  • What can you do to strengthen the relationships in your life?
  • What can you do if you think you’re a great listener but people around you keep complaining about you not listening?
  • Why is it a recipe for disaster to look for someone to complete you and what should you be looking for instead?
  • What are the Five Languages of Appreciation and how can you pick the best one for each of your relationships?
  • What are the three parts of communication and how does your awareness of each part help to mitigate miscommunication?
  • How do you identify the love languages of family, friends, and coworkers?
  • Why are openness and vulnerability mandatory when it comes to figuring out the love languages of the people in your life?
  • What little signals can you pay attention to so you can get an idea for how your loved ones communicate?

In order to deepen the connections we have with the people around us, it’s important to understand how the people around us prefer to be treated. Just because you view the giving and receiving of affection one way, doesn’t mean everyone else does as well. Some people prefer to show their appreciation through words, some prefer to show it through gifts, and some prefer the spending of quality time together – and that’s just to name a few.

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Resources from this Episode

Episode 719 Why Emotional Connection Makes or Breaks a Relationship
The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace by Gary Chapman
The 5 Love Languages of Children by Gary Chapman
Learn Your Love Language with this Quiz

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AJ Harbinger - author of 1156 posts on The Art of Charm

AJ Harbinger is one of the world’s top relationship development experts. His company, The Art of Charm, is a leading training facility for top performers that want to overcome social anxiety, develop social capital and build relationships of the highest quality. Raised by a single father, AJ felt a strong desire to learn about relationships and the elements that make them successful. However, this interest went largely untapped for many years. Following the path set out for him by his family, AJ studied biology in college and went on to pursue a Ph.D. in Cancer Biology at the University of Michigan. It was at this time that he began to feel immense pressure from the cancer lab he worked in and began to explore other outlets for expression. It was at this point that The Art of Charm Podcast was born.

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2 Comments on “767: How to master communication in a relationship”

  1. I know that my love languages are: quality time and physical touch are tied the top two. And them words of affirmation is second. However, I was curious if these ever change throughout our lives as we grow older?

    1. Hi I am manly only interested in trying to build the spark and fire between me and my partner. She hasn’t been sexualy intimate with me not even showed affection kissing holding hands almost 3 years but constantly likes to joke about how I’m not getting sex and if don’t like it I know where the door is and don’t let it hit me on way out

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