Unless you marry your first girlfriend, chances are good that you’re going to have to be dealing with a break up at some point in your life. It might not be a disaster of an acrimonious breakup, just one that leaves you more than a little worse for wear. Getting back on the horse after a long relationship and a breakup that leaves you feeling a little damaged isn’t easy, but it’s something that you’re going to have to do sooner rather than later.
Here’s our guide on the best course of action.
Table of contents
Don’t Remain In Contact
The first thing that you need to do when dealing with a break up is stop paying attention to what your ex is doing. Unfollow her Twitter, hide her updates on Facebook, don’t chat with her. You need to carve out some mental space for yourself and you’re just not going to be able to do that when you’re constantly checking up on how she’s doing or continuing to have long chats with her. When it’s over, it’s over. Maybe the two of you can be friends one day, but today is not that day.
Prioritize Your Time
The first step toward improving your life after a breakup and a long relationship is to start prioritizing your time. First comes work and career, the things that make everything else possible. Then comes self-improvement: Hitting the gym, picking up new skills and the like. Then comes your hobbies, passions and interests, whatever they might be. Only once you’ve made enough time for all of those things do you have time for other people.
Invest In Yourself
Why? Because this is a time in your life when you need to invest in yourself. That’s the best way to heal after things have taken a turn for the worse in your last relationship and you’re dealing with a break up: To throw your time and energy into yourself, to better yourself, to do all of the things that you always wanted to do but never felt that you had the time for when the two of you were together. That’s what’s going to best prepare you to get back out there.
Get Back Out There
And eventually you’re going to want to get back out there. Sooner is better than later, but also don’t rush yourself. Let’s face it: There’s never a perfect time to start getting out there and meeting women again. You might have to push yourself a bit to do this. But when you do, you need to fully commit to getting out there and meeting new people in whatever way makes sense for you. And if you’ve followed the previous steps, this is when you can try to win her back if you so choose.
Have Fun Filtering
Now that you’ve been through a breakup, you probably have a better idea of what you want in a partner, as well as what you don’t want. Don’t be afraid to filter people out, but also don’t be so afraid of getting hurt again that you never filter anyone in. Have fun with it; At the end of the day, that’s the name of the game.
