There’s no two ways about it: Breakups hurt like hell. But if you want to get past it, one of the best ways to do that is by dating again. But as with anything else, there’s a right way and a wrong way to go about dating again after a breakup. The Art of Charm is in the business of helping men to do their best. Here are a few helpful pointers on how to start dating again after a breakup.
Don’t Do It Right Away
You might be tempted to head out there and throw yourself headlong into dating again after you break up. Instead, take time for yourself. Throw yourself into work, spend some time at the gym and make time for your hobbies and passions. Take time for yourself. Not only do you need it right now, it’s also going to give your time more value. This will really pay off when you start dating again in earnest.
Don’t Wait Forever
At the same time, you don’t want to wait forever. Chances are pretty good that you’re never going to feel “ready” no matter how much time you take. There’s always a reason to not do the thing you know you need to do. So push yourself a little bit. Get out there when you’ve taken some time for yourself, but realize that actually the last part of getting yourself “ready” is actually getting out there and doing it. A large part of knowing how to start dating again comes down to timing.
Start By Being Casual and Having Fun
You don’t want to take things too seriously too quickly. Don’t go out for the purpose of finding “the one.” Instead, go out for the purpose of having a killer time, enjoying yourself, meeting new people and taking things as they come. Go out for the purpose of having a great night and I guarantee that your chances of meeting a great woman are going to be a lot better.
Don’t Be Afraid to Filter
Filtering can mean one of two things: Letting the right ones in or keeping the wrong ones out. When it comes to both kinds, you shouldn’t be afraid to do them. Why? Because you’re a high-value man who has his pick of the women, so don’t feel like you need to offer your time to everyone. At the same time, don’t use being picky as an excuse for inaction. When you find the right girl, you’ll know.
Give Every Girl You Date a Chance
When you go on a date with a girl, you’re escalating things. You’re not asking her to get married or even to be exclusive, but it’s different than just talking to her at a bar or club. So you need to give every girl you go on a date with a chance. Don’t shut her down before things even get started by comparing her to your ex or assuming things will go badly. It’s a disservice for both of you and is too common a mistake made by guys wanting to know how to start dating again.
