How to Use Approach Anxiety to Your Advantage

Approach anxiety affects every guy on some level. Although not every guy hyperventilates when approaching a beautiful woman, we all know what it feels like to have our hearts start racing as we take those slow, dramatic steps forward.

A lot of guys are asking, “How can I overcome approach anxiety?” But the question is built on a faulty premise. You don’t have to crush your fear in order to make progress. In fact, you can actually use approach anxiety to your advantage, and if properly managed, those uneasy feelings can help you to build attraction.

The first thing you need to understand is that you are going to get rejected. Yes. It’s going to happen. A lot. The sooner you accept it and get over it, the sooner you can release that pressure and just start having fun with the interactions. When you allow yourself to work through the approach anxiety, even the anxiety itself becomes a source of fun, rather than pain.

So just accept the fear and start approaching anyway. The more you do it, the more comfortable you will become. The more comfortable you become, the more natural your approaches appear, and the more fun you will have in the process. And as you have fun, you exhibit attractive qualities. So just get started regardless of how afraid you are.

If anxiety holds you back, start off easy. Push yourself to meet two to three new people every time you go out, and try to see it as a fun, exhilarating challenge. If you can’t always think of the perfect words to say, don’t beat yourself up. We all have trouble finding the right words sometimes, but you can make a strong impression by just bantering, showing interest, finding out interesting things about her and building a connection. You can learn to master all of these skills in The Art of Charm Academy.

Remember, it’s okay to be yourself. Women are looking for a connection, and by simply allowing yourself to be vulnerable (in other words: human), you make it far easier for a woman to connect with you on an emotional level. If you feel uneasy but act like James Bond, she’s going to sense the façade, and wonder if you have something to hide. This will completely wreck your chances.

But the big takeaway here is to just get out there and start approaching! Remember, at the end of the day, she’ll either be attracted to you or she won’t. But if she never even gets the chance to meet you or see you, your chances of success are zero.


in Approaching A Woman, Art of Dating, Building A Connection