Breaking up with someone is one of the hardest things that you can do as an adult male. This is most of all true because you don’t want to be a dick about it. There’s no reason and trust us: You’re going to regret not taking the high road a lot more than doing the right thing years later. Here’s our fast guide on how to break up with someone the right way.
Do It On Neutral Ground
When you’re thinking of how to break up with someone, don’t do it at your place or her place. Instead, a coffee shop out of the way and nearer to her place than yours is the best way to go. Give yourself a time limit for how long it’s going to take and stick to it. The thing about neutral ground is that it allows you — and her for that matter — a chance to leave if things get to be too much. It also allows you to exit in your own time.
Be Clear About Your Reasons
You should create a list of the reasons that you want to break up before you head down to actually do it. This will leave you prepared for the discussion. It will also make it harder for her to argue you out of breaking up. Once the decision has been made, it’s something that you need to stick to, no matter what. Getting back together with her after you decide to break up is only going to make the issues that caused you to break up in the first place get worse.
Don’t Point Fingers
It’s important to focus on you and how you feel when you go to break up with her. Making it about her and her behavior gives her a lot more room to wiggle out of it. Instead, just tell her that things are not going in the way that you want them to and that you aren’t happy because of such and such reasons. She can argue with you about whether or not she acts in a certain way. She can’t argue with you about your feelings.
Pay for Her Drink
When the time is up, put money on the table and tell her that you have to be somewhere else. Work-related excuses are probably the best ones, as they’re the hardest ones to attack. If you have to cry wait until you’re totally out of the scene of the breakup before you do so. Once it’s over, it’s over. Don’t let her keep you there longer than you planned to be.
Be Firm, But Sensitive to Her Reaction
Remember that you have to live your life for you. Don’t allow her reaction and her emotions sway you to make a decision that isn’t the right one for you. Be sensitive, but don’t let her make you change your mind because of her reaction. If she starts really overreacting and getting hysterical, just leave. That’s why you need to break up in a neutral location.