Never date people you work with? Maybe. This is one of those pieces of advice that’s not so much bad as it is incomplete. You can date coworkers. It’s just the type of thing that you need to carefully evaluate the risk versus the reward. Once that’s out of the way, you can start to focus on creating attraction between you and your would-be workplace sweetheart with this guide of how to start dating a coworker.
Evaluating the Ups and Downs
We can’t give you a straightforward answer on whether or not it’s “worth it.” But you do need to consider that dating at the workplace can be very uncomfortable if the two of you break up. In a worst-case scenario, you might be violating a workplace rule and lose your job over it. The circumstances vary from one person to another. Look at your own situation, evaluate the risks and rewards and come to the best conclusion that you can. Knowing how to start dating that cute girl in the office requires knowing if it is even a good idea.
Flirting at Work
Believe it or not, you can flirt with coworkers. You just have to be a little more cautious than you might be in other venues. Start off with light banter and playful conversations. See how she responds to this. If she’s joking around and cracking wise back, you might want to flirt in a more direct manner. Always keep things light and playful and always respect her boundaries especially around the workplace.
Getting to Know Her
Of course, just having a flirtatious rapport with someone isn’t going to get you the date. You also want to establish common interests and begin building an emotional bond. Around the workplace everyone is doing their job, yet we still all find time to get to know one another. Take time to get to know her — who she is, what her story is, what she’s about and the like. Being workplace pals with someone is a great basis for going ahead and getting the date.
Asking Her Out
When you ask her out, it’s good to ask out an entire group. That’s much safer for you. So arrange some kind of workplace get together with all the people you hang out with at work. Once you’re all there, try and find time to get her alone. You don’t have to try anything ambitious like getting her to a separate location or even getting her back to your place. It’s just about making time with her, gauging how much of her interest is interest in you and how much of it is just workplace banter.
Once you’ve established that there is a connection there, you can go ahead and set up a more formal “date” between the two of you. If she’s not interested in your first idea, or is busy, don’t be afraid to pitch her on another killer date idea.
And if she says she doesn’t date guys she works with? Best to back off. Not only could you be putting yourself in trouble if you pursue it, your energies are best spent other places. This is probably the most important part of knowing how to start dating a coworker.