Even if you had a killer first date, there’s still room to learn from your mistakes. So how do you do that? It can be difficult. Because looking at yourself and seeing what you did wrong can be painful. Thus, many people avoid the process. However, we at The Art of Charm believe that this is necessary for you to grow as a person. So how do you learn from the mistakes you made on your first date?
Step 1: Check Your Ego
Before you go any further, you need to check your ego. You need to accept that, in thinking about what you did wrong on a first date, you’re going to have to confront some things about yourself that you’d rather not. This is often the hardest part. But for men who are looking to level up their dating life, it’s absolutely essential to realize that whatever you’ve been doing in the past has not gotten you where you want to be or where you need to be. Remember that the kind of growth you’re looking for here is going to be painful at times. Don’t avoid it: Accept it as part of the process and you’re going to go a lot further. Trust us. We’ve gone through this with literally thousands of guys.
Step 2: Think About the Date
Literally construct a mental timeline of the date. Maybe you actually want to write things down. That’s fine too. But the point is that you need to go through the date with some rigor. Before you can identify what went wrong, you need to identify what happened. So what happened? And in what order did it happen? How did one event influence another? Breaking things down in your head like this is going to be most of the heavy lifting when it comes to evaluating what you could have done better on your date.
Step 3: Think About What You Would Have Done Differently
The first part of this is identifying what you wish you had done better. Now you need to start thinking about what you would have done differently. Maybe you aren’t sure. That’s OK, too. But maybe you do have ideas of what you could have done better on the date. In that case, go ahead and write them down, but also understand why you think those would have worked better.
Step 4: Pat Yourself on the Back
No, not for doing this exercise, but go ahead and pat yourself on the back for that too. No, you want to pat yourself on the back for what you did right. Even if you just had the worst date of your life, you must have done something right, even if it was keep your cool under pressure. End with a list of the best things you did on a date. Aim for five, but even if you can only get one, that’s where you need to end things.
Second Date Ideas
Now that you’ve assessed your first date mistakes, you’re ready to make a killer impression on your second date. If you need some unforgettable second date ideas, be sure and explore our blog for additional resources. In addition to second date ideas, we have detailed strategies for putting your best foot forward and leaving her wanting more.
