Approaching Women During the Day – What You Need to Know

Meet women in the dayDo you want to meet more women during the day but are unsure of how to approach girls in the daytime environment?  Are you worried walking up to a girl in the daytime is “weird”, and you would just wind up annoying her?  If so here are some tips on how to approach girls that will help you change your mindset, and make it easier to start meeting women during the day.

It’s only weird if you make it weird

Walking up to a girl at a coffee shop, bookstore, or anywhere else doesn’t have to be weird.  The fact of the matter is it’s only weird if you make it weird.  When you walk up to a girl with a feeling of “this is wrong, I shouldn’t be doing this” it’s that feeling that creates the “weird” vibe.  Get rid of that feeling and both you and the girl will be able to relax and enjoy meeting one another.

The best way to get rid of that “I shouldn’t be doing this” feeling when learning how to approach girls is to get lots of experience meeting women.  The more approaches you have under your belt the more you will realize how all the fears and worries you have about approaching women only exist in your head.

In the meantime, to ease that worry you can always just point out the weirdness you feel.  You can approach a girl and say something like “Hi, I feel weird doing this but you’re cut and I wanted to meet you”.  After pointing out how weird you feel you may notice a lot of that uncomfortable tension disappears on its own.

Women need you

Guys who want to know how to approach girls in the daytime are often afraid they’re just going to “bother” or “annoy” women (before my AoC bootcamp I was totally one of those guys).  But most women would love to meet a guy during the day.  It makes for a better story than meeting someone at a bar and shakes up the monotony of a woman’s day-to-day routine.

Keep this in mind when learning how to approach girls and make your approaches more about doing something for them.  You want to make your approaches less about getting something for yourself (like a smile, phone number, or date) and more about creating a shared, enjoyable experience for both of you.  Have that attitude and a lot of the fear, anxiety, and resistance you might have towards approaching women will disappear.  In fact, you might start feeling compelled to approach women during the daytime so you can save them from what may very well be a boring, stressful day.

Get some confidence points

Many guys are afraid to approach and start conversations with attractive women during the daytime.  So just by walking up to a girl during the day you automatically earn huge confidence points right off the bat.

To show even more confidence make sure you maintain confident body language when approaching women.  Keep your head up, back straight, and relax your arms by yours sides.  Make steady eye contact and give the girl a warm, friendly smile as you approach her.  As you talk to her avoid fidgeting and keep your body movements smooth and controlled.  Being able to maintain confident body language is huge when learning how to approach girls– no matter what environment you are in.

Daygame vs. nightgame

There is a difference in how to approach girls in the daytime vs. at night.  The daytime environment is a lot calmer and more relaxed.  So you don’t need to go in with as much energy as you might need in a club.  This means you’ll be able to more easily get away with low-key openers, such as compliments.

Compliment how a girl looks at a bar and she may just her to roll her eyes (since she’s already had 1,000 guys compliment her that night).  But that same compliment in the daytime can light a girl up and get a conversation rolling.  The key to making a compliment opener work though is to make it genuine and deliver it with no-strings attached.  If she sees you are not just saying this to “get” something in return and are just expressing your appreciation, she’s going to be more flattered and interested in getting to know you.

A great exercise you can do to really internalize this “no-strings-attached” attitude is to go around and compliment women – and then just walk away.  Don’t wait around for a “thank you” or anything.  This is excellent practice when first learning how to approach girls during the day as it will get you comfortable breaking the ice.  You’ll likely find you get a bit of a charge from doing it and will then feel even more motivated to engage with these women.

Dealing with rejection

When guys want to learn how to approach girls they often look to find the perfect lines/techniques that will ensure they never get shot down.  But there are so many factors that determine how a woman will respond (like her mood or personal history) that have absolutely nothing to do with what you do or say.  So this goal of “never getting rejected” is an impossible standard to set.

Rather than trying to figure out a way to please every attractive woman in the world (good luck with that) you are better off just learning to embrace rejection.  It’s going to happen so you may as well learn to love it.

Instead of seeing rejection as failure, see it as a sign you are moving forward, taking risks, and pushing yourself.  You can even make a joke of it by competing with your friends to see who can tally the most rejections in a single day.  The more rejection you experience the less you will fear it.  And without that fear you will become absolutely unstoppable when it comes to approaching women.

AoC Lab Tested

First Impressions Mean Everything

Discover the 3 Most Critical Non-Verbal Signals that Kill Your First Impression Before You Even Get the Chance to Say Hello

(Learn the 3 Non-Verbal Keys To A Great First Impression)

Brian M - author of 192 posts on The Art of Charm

Once he realized attracting women was something he could learn Brian spent way too much of his free time studying and practicing everything he could find on the subject. He stumbled across The Art of Charm Podcast and eventually signed up for an AoC bootcamp. Excited by the progress he’s made in his own life since the program he decided to start writing for AoC to help other guys do the same. By writing about interpersonal dynamics he’s finally able to put that psychology degree to good use.

Email

  • morris

    great article…just wish I had discovered this site earlier