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What Attracts Women?

What Attracts Women?
What attracts women ultimately goes far beyond looks and money. Real, lasting attraction isn’t about what you have – it’s about who you are. And the more you work on becoming a better you, the easier it’s going to be to attract women. For specific traits you can develop that will make you more attractive to women – and a better you – read on.

Women want a leader
One of the most attractive traits a man can have is leadership. Women want a man who can take charge, make decisions, and get things done. It shows women confidence and lets them know you’re a man they can count on.

If you want to demonstrate leadership, a great time to do so is during your dates with women. Anytime you invite a girl on a date, be sure to take the lead by taking care of the logistics yourself. Figuring out when to meet, where to go, how long it will last – it’s all up to you. Handling these details shows women confidence and leadership, and gives her a chance to just relax and have a good time.

(As for ideas on what to do on a date, check out the Art of Charm podcast on how to have a great first date as well as the date idea cheat sheet).

Women want integrity
A wildly important – but often overlooked trait that attracts women is integrity. When a man says/does things that are consistent with who he is it shows women confidence and lets them know he’s trustworthy –which is crucial in building lasting attraction with women.

Having integrity in your conversations with women means that, instead of searching for the perfect line to say to a girl, you can simply state how you feel. For example, if you think a girl is cute and want to meet her, all you have to say “hi, you’re cute and I wanted to meet you”. You gain huge points approaching women directly like this because it shows women confidence. It also shows that you’re genuine, which lets her know she can trust you.

Attract women by managing tension
Women are attracted to men who can handle themselves in difficult situations. If a woman sees that you can handle yourself when shit hits the fan, then she knows you can take care of her in those moments, too. This is an important element for building deep attraction with women.

The perfect time to show you’re a man that can take care of yourself and her comes during moments of high tension. For example, take awkward silences that occur during your conversations with women. You can use these moments to create attraction with women by embracing the tension that arises. You can even acknowledge it, by smiling saying something like “oh look, an awkward silence…” This has a way of diffusing the tension, and creates attraction with women by showing that you can handle uncomfortable situations.

Attract women with a magnetic personality
A positive attitude can go a long way in attracting women. Attitudes are contagious, and if you feel good when having a conversation with a woman, then she’s going to feel good talking to you, too.

So in your conversations with women, be sure to avoid whining, complaining, or talking shit. Instead, keep your attitude and the conversation positive. Talk about what’s awesome in your life and the environment you’re in. Ask the girl questions about the things she loves to do for fun and is passionate about. Having positive conversations with women is a surefire way to make women want to be around you.

Women want a challenge
What attracts women is a man that provides a challenge – not a doormat they can walk all over. Show women that you have standards – that you’re attracted to women who have more to offer than just looks – and they will see who as a high-value guy worth chasing.

A simple way to show you have standards and give women a little challenge is to mix in a bit of qualification early on during your conversations with a woman. Ask a girl a question like “so what’s your deal?” or “what are 3 things I wouldn’t know about you by looking?” These are good questions to ask a girl because they show you’re interest and get her to start proving herself to you. This little challenge can be all it takes to flip the script and get a girl to chase you.

Attract women without trying
If you want to get women attracted to you, don’t be the guy who needs validation from women in order to feel complete. Be the guy who loves his life regardless of whether or not he gets approval from women. That is the kind of non-needy guy women want to date.

So to get women interested in you, focus on having a satisfying life outside of women. Peruse the activities and hobbies you love. Eat well and exercise, as that will boost your mood and help you feel good in your body. The more you can fill up on things that make you love life and feel good about yourself, the easier it’s going to be for you to naturally attract women.