Men are often clueless when it comes to knowing what to say to girls that are in a bad mood. They wind up saying the wrong things and adding more fuel to the fire. But if you know what to say to girls in these situations then you can help a girl overcome her bad mood. Her negative attitude then becomes a great opportunity for you to separate yourself from other guys and build attraction with women. If you’re interested in learning what to say to girls when they’re in a bad mood so you can create that attraction with women, read on.
Banter with women
If the girl is in a bad mood over something small (a parking ticket, tough day at work) then all she needs is a little distraction. Mix in some fun, playful banter with the woman and you can shake that sour mood and get the girl smiling in no time.
A great banter technique to use in these situations is role play. This means making up fun roles for the two of you to imagine yourselves playing. You could, for example, take on the roles of travel buddies. When thinking of what to say to girls in this situation, you could come up with something like, “Let’s get out of here, steal a private jet, and head to Maui where we can lay on the beach and swim with sea turtles all day”.
When bantering with women keep in mind that the more you enjoy your banter lines the more likely she is to enjoy them as well. (For more banter tips and examples check out the Art of Charm podcasts on how to banter with women.)
Build rapport with women
If there’s a deeper cause for her bad mood then bantering with women probably won’t work. In times like these it’s often better to build rapport with women as that can help the girl work through her issue.
The first step in building rapport with women is simply to ask the girl what’s going on. Once you learn what she’s going through, relate her experience to your own life. Chances are at one time you’ve felt the same way she feels now. Share what that feeling was like and maybe even share how you worked through it. Building rapport with a woman like this can get the girl to feel more connected to you and shows her she’s not alone.
(For a deeper look into how to build rapport with women check out the Art of Charm Podcast with Bryan Bayer)
When the best thing to say to a woman is NOTHING
One of the biggest mistakes men make when trying to figure out what to say to girls who are in a bad mood is thinking they have to “fix” the situation. That is, a guy will think he has to cheer her up and make the girl smile, or offer advice as to how to make things better.
But all too often this is not what women want. Instead what women want is for you to just be there and be supportive. How do you do that? Start by asking the woman a question like “Do you want to talk about what’s bothering you?” If she does, just sit back and listen. Let her process through her emotions and simply validate how she feels (at most all you have to say to the girl are things like “Wow, that really sucks” or “I’m sorry to hear that”). This will allow her to feel supported and connected to you, which will help get the girl out of that funk.
Getting the girl to chase you
Sometimes all women want is to be left alone. A good question to ask a girl then, is “Do you want to be left alone, or could you use some company?” If the woman wants to be alone, honor that request and give her the space to work through her bad mood in her own way.
As counterintuitive as it may seem, walking away can sometimes be the best way to get a girl to like you. It shows you understand how she feels and respect her privacy. Being understood and respected is exactly what women want from a man. Once her mood improves, don’t be surprised if this behavior gets the girl to chase you, looking for a chance to connect.
What to say to girls who lash out
Despite your best intentions you might find that your attempt to start a conversation with the woman who is in a bad mood goes horribly wrong. She may lash out at you or give you the cold shoulder. In either instance, it’s important to keep the following two things in mind:
First, remember to not take anything personally. Her reaction likely has nothing to do with how you approached the woman or what you said to the girl.
Secondly, remember to maintain your own standards and integrity. If she starts to treat you poorly gently let her know that you are not going to accept that. Tell the girl something like “If you want to talk I’m here for you, but if you’re going to lash out then I’m leaving” – and mean it. Allowing yourself to be her emotional punching bag won’t help either of you. But walking away in this situation shows a confidence and self-acceptance that women want in men.
(For more on how to attract women by setting standards and sticking by them, check out the Art of Charm Podcast with Dr. Robert Glover on how to eliminate “Nice Guy Syndrome)
