How is Women's Body Language Different from Men's

Women body language is not all that different from men’s body language.  We all use the same facial expressions and – for the most part – the same body language to express how we feel.  But there are a couple minor differences that separate women body language from that of men.  Here are a few of those differences, along with some tips on how to take advantage of them when attracting women.

How women attract men

When women want to attract men they will adopt more feminine body language.  A woman will play up her feminine side by twirling her hair, giggling, sticking out their chest, making her legs more visible, etc.  If a girl switches gears and acts more “girly” when she’s around you – or makes a point to show off her feminine curves – then there’s a good chance she’s interested in you.

In order to generate this response you want to adopt more masculine body language anytime you’re out.  Stand tall with your shoulders rolled down and back.  Allow yourself to take up space while keeping your head up and smiling.  By adopting this confident, masculine body language you’re more likely to get women to notice you in a positive way.

How women get attention

Women who want a man’s attention will often try to get it indirectly.  Rather than walking straight up to a guy she may “accidentally” bump into him.  Or she’ll drop something near him hoping that it gets him to notice her.

Guys often miss these signals because they’re so subtle.  They view them as accidents – not signs of interest.  To make sure you don’t let these opportunities pass you by assume that anytime a woman does something like this it’s because she’s interested in you.  This assumption won’t always be correct, but so what?  Thinking this way ensures you’ll take advantage of those opportunities when they come.  It will also help you be more confident (and therefore attractive) in your interactions with women.

Signs of attraction

One sign of attraction that’s far more likely to be seen through women’s body language than men’s is preening.  When a girl is preening (subtly adjusting her clothing, jewelry, hair, etc. in order to appear more attractive) it’s often a signal that the girl is interested.  And if the girl starts preening you, it’s an even stronger indicator of interest.

Too much preening however can be a bad thing.  If a girl is so focused on these adjustments that she’s ignoring her environment completely (or just ignoring you) then it’s clear she’s lost interest.  When you see this make a point to switch gears and change the topic of conversation – before it’s too late.

More signs of attraction

Another sign of attraction that’s generally only spotted in women body language comes when a girl is sitting cross legged.  If a girl sits cross-legged it shows she feels comfortable with you (people don’t cross their legs if they’re uncomfortable/nervous).  And you can further gauge her interest by seeing how she crosses her legs.  If she crosses her legs toward you, it’s a sign she’s feeling connected and engaged. But if she crosses her legs away from you, it shows she feels a little distant.

If a woman is crossing her legs away from you respond by mirroring her body language and angling your body away slightly.  If she’s crossing her legs toward you, feel free to face her more directly.  By mirroring her body language you ensure you don’t wind up showing too much interest and appear as though you’re chasing her.

Signs of anxiety

Both men and women will use pacifying behaviors when they feel stressed or anxious.  Men are more likely to touch and rub their face, scratch their forearm, or adjust their tie.  Women on the other hand will touch their neck, brush their clothes, toy with their jewelry, or stroke their hair.  If you see this kind of women body language again and again there’s a good chance the woman is feeling anxious or nervous.

When you see signs of anxiety in a woman’s body language remember that it’s not necessarily a bad thing.  It may mean she just wants to make a good impression on you.  It’s also a great opportunity for you build attraction by helping her ease that anxiety.  If you have the power to ease her anxiety and get her feeling relaxed, joyful, or excited, then she’ll want to be around you that much more.

As for how to ease that anxiety, one method is to playfully point out what’s going on.  If you notice she keeps stroking her hair you can say “I’ve noticed you keep stroking your hair.  Are you nervous?  Because I’m a bit nervous myself.”  Bringing this up can automatically help ease that anxiety.  It also shows you’re perceptive to how she feels, which is going to help her feel more connected to you.  And by saying you’re also nervous you show her that it’s safe for her to admit to any feelings of anxiety.

Eye contact

There isn’t much difference between how men and women make and use eye contact.  But how that eye contact is perceived is another story.

If you make eye contact with a woman and she looks down and away abruptly, it may signal that the girl is interested but embarrassed to show it.   Avoiding eye contact like this can be an endearing sign of attraction from women.

But if a guy looks down and away after making eye contact with a woman, it’s not endearing.  It shows insecurity which is a huge turn-off for women.  What you want to do when a woman meets your gaze is give her a warm, relaxed smile while maintaining eye contact.  This will show that friendly confidence women find attractive.

Questions?

If you have any questions about women body language, or want more information on how to meet and attract women, give our support staff a shout.  Located in the chat window on the bottom right of your screen they will help you find exactly what you need to take your dating life to the next level.

If you really want to take your game to the next level, check out The Art of Charm Academy.

Brian M - author of 191 posts on The Art of Charm

Once he realized attraction was something he could learn, Brian spent way too much of his free time studying and practicing everything he could find on the subject. He stumbled across The Art of Charm podcast and eventually signed up for an AoC bootcamp. Excited by the progress he's made in his own life since the program, he decided to start writing for AoC to help other guys do the same. By writing about interpersonal dynamics, he’s finally able to put that psychology degree to good use.

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in Art of Dating, Flirting And Attraction

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